Well - the snow seemed to be the final blow - is everything conspiring agaiinst me!!! I was supposed to be going to see the Cardiologist today and to have a scan to check what was happening to the fluid I have/had round my heart - that was as a result of my first medical "event" (if we can have a snow event - I can have a medical one, or two). First "event" was open heart surgery (end August last year) to replace my Aortic valve with one donated by a pig! (never expected that one either!) Just getting over that when I had the second "event" a pericardial effusion I had somehow managed to store up 2 litres of fluid in the sac round my heart so was effectively crushing it - it must be the yorkshire in me that doesn't like parting with anything! - but had to let go of it (with the assistance of some very large syringes and a man with an ultrasound machine- it occured to me that it was very similar to operating one of those machines in a fairground - the ones where you have to operate a arm which "grabs" a cuddly toy), After recovering I was celebrating my return imminent return to work when the "lump" appeared. - well I expect it may have been there a while but had got overlooked in the middle of all the other stuff!
Live in the countryside - no real neighbours and my husband is working away house is down a steep driveway with a hairpin bend in it - it is so pretty - but absolutely terrible when we get any snow. Tried to get out this morning but after doing some not so graceful pirouettes (just had to look the spelling up of that one) I decided that I wasn't going anywhere in a hurry - the hospital is twenty miles away and I can do without stressing myself about getting there, I'm going back in on Friday morning to have the rest of my lymph nodes removed (7 out of 7 taken for biopsy were positive) and a bit more from my left breast - just to make sure the margins are good enough. Then off for a visit to the oncologist in a few weeks to decide the chemo etc....
I live in a lovely area with amazing scenery right out of my window - and I realised that it may be cold - I may be feeling extremely frustrated after having to re-arrange my medical appointments, none of which I ever really wanted anyway - who wants heart problems and then bc? But, I have lit the fire, got a book, stroked the dogs and made myself a hot chocolate and the world doesn't seem such a bad place after all and it's so beautiful outside - more so when I'm snug and warm!!
FormerMember
Hi I agree best stay put i live on the pennines on a farm and the disttric nurse couldn,t get yesterday or today to give me my shots to boost my blood cells so my husband walked down to the village with me so i could get them at the surgery no waitin then got a lift up agin and am now tucked up have let dog out for a run in the snow took some hay for the horse and enjoyed the view the irony is my hubby has gone to collect our new car [4x4] but we couldn't get our other car out to go for it!! still things conspire against us but days like this a chill and relax with the comfort of nature has to be good [and hot chocolate] good luck with your op on friday have had the same done back in nov have just had third chemo pm me if u want to ask anything i am a bit further down the road still hard but gettin on with treatment feels like u are doin something1
Hi Jenny Mary - you have certainly been in the wars and should by rights have been left in peace and quiet. You have been whacked twice; once with your heart condition, and now cancer as well. I've started to believe that when cancer enters our lives, we stop walking in straight lines - we are forever peeking around the next corner to see what surprises are in store for us. Let's hope the only surprise around your particular corner will turn out to be the arrival of the snow. The fire, the good book, the cuddling of your dogs and the hot chocolate will do much to soothe you, and I'm glad you're snug and warm. I hope the rest of your journey is easier, with lots of love kate xxxxxxxxx
Thanks for the thoughts - very wise what you say about straight lines and waitiing for the next surprise - but I can feel sorry enough for myself, so I shouldn't be indulged to carry on doing it!
Today has been a day of contrasts actually laughed out loud today - took a photo but can't manage to post it on here keeps coming back with errors - think it is too large even though I reduced it - title was: - I think that my cockerel must be wondering why his bum is cold!
Explanation - as I can't get the photo up!
We've got some chickens and a couple of cockerels (one called megan because we didn't know he was a boy 'til he started crowing at six months old) he really is so stupid - I went down to check them this afternoon as it's been blizzard conditions -when I got to the chicken run - Megan was standing where he had obviously been for a long while - as he had a snow drift right up against him, with his wings drooping (he is usually such a haughty creature) - so I just had to pick him up, put him inside my coat and keep him there until he got warmed up. I then put some food into his hut just inside the door so as he'd go inside - what did he do - just sat there with his bum hanging out probably wondering why it's so cold! Just checked and he's gone in now - good job because it's really freezing crispy snow now.!
Love my chickens - they are such fun to watch - and they give me lovely golden yolked eggs!
Hi Jen You have been through the pooh gal. I will be thinking of you on Friday and praying for you although if there is a God he ain't got much of a sense of humour at times. There ain't no atheists on battlefields so they say, so I'll hedge my bets and have a word with him. I hopefully get my results on Thurs 5th. IT is the waiting that I find the biggest Hell. My dear friend died today age 87 bless her. She had only been in a Nursing home three weeks she did not want to go but realised she had no option. So had a few tears for her as well as me. She always said it's a long lane that has no turning. I wonder whether we will ever walk a straight path again sometimes.
Do keep in touch and let me know how you get on PLEASE.
i would just like to tell you something positive, although i have terminal secondary`s when i was first diagnosed it didn`t have any lymph nodes involved. that was in 99,now (this is the good bit) my mum was diagnosed in 2000 20 nodes involved full masectomy blah blah the works, only a matter of time before she died, wel have you guessed it shes still here and doing great, when i got told abot my prognosis in may i asked them to do a full body scan on mum and she`s clear as a bell! so fight the fight and good luck
