This is it then - the final blog before surgery.
I've done as instructed, phoned in to check all is well and what time I'm on the slab and received my first shock, which isn't bad seeing as we're still a day away. Apparently I'm first on the list which means I've to be at the hospital for 7.15am - now I think that's early, imagine what my daughter, who has volunteered to give me a lift, is going to think............I could be walking in!!
So now all the thoughts and fears begin to kick in. What's going to be stuck where when I wake up? Which bits will be hurting? How much feeling will I lose and where? Will my mouth drop on the left? Am I going to lose the ability to lift my left arm above shoulder level? What will be the 70's hit on Hospital radio when I come round? The answer to these and many more questions will be available at some point tomorrow - later rather than sooner I imagine, as I'm in theatre for a 'good 5 hours' (to quote my consultant).
Much of my nervousness comes from the fact that I am so utterly not in control of what happens tomorrow. I am totally in the hands of a relative stranger who is doing things which are way beyond my comprehension and he's doing them to me. Would we trust somebody we didn't know with so much responsibility in any other situation? Probably not.
Now here's a thought. How many mistakes do you make in your working day? Hmmm.........
When I had my first cancer related op back in April the nurse preparing me told me not to be worried about asking the surgeon anything at all because "at the end of the day he's only a bloke doing his job'.
"He doesn't want to be" was my reply "I know what people just doing their job are like. This guy needs to be a superstar."
Now I know we all have a moan and groan about the NHS but on the whole they do a bloody good job. I have had very little to complain about thus far other than waiting around. When it's come to treatment and aftercare everyone I have come into contact with have been first rate and all have been superstars. The added bonus is that I get this stupendous service for free, except it isn't really free is it - have you ever looked at how much NI is deducted from your wages? That though is a discussion for another day.
OK better go and pack my dressing gown and sandals (oh yes they're going with me) and before you all start - I've only got a dressing gown for when I'm in the hospital, it isn't part of my normal daily attire.
Finally on a serious note, I forgot to list probably the biggest concern over what faces me when I come round tomorrow - What will the person who was in the bed before me have ordered for tea?
Catch up with y'all in a few days.
Stay positive - have fun.
Steve
