The second half of 2023 went by in a bit of blur because I left England to join my son and his family in Northern Ireland. What a beautiful place it is and you wouldn't find friendlier folk anywhere on this planet.
Both halves of 2024 left me equally dazed but I eventually found my new home and moved in during the spring of 2025. The location was ideal; conveniently close to my son but at a sufficient distance to maintain my independence with a helping hand not too far away when needed.
At the time, none of us knew just how soon that helping hand would be required.
Early in the summer of 2025 I noticed a couple of new lesions on a different part of my scalp. I decided to keep an eye on them for a while, to see what happened. I knew that GPs call this 'watchful waiting'. In my experience it usually goes down well if you've given it a go before requesting an appointment.
So, I watchfully waited for long enough to satisfy myself I had a new problem, and off I went to meet the second GP.
She was very friendly and asked one or two questions as she peered at her desktop. Well, at least that's how she started off, but as soon as I mentioned I'd moved across from England she said: "Oh."
Apparently my medical records were destined to remain on the other side of the Irish Sea because for some reason NHS England didn't share them with NHS Northern Ireland. I hoped the bots would take good care of them.
NHS England can be a bit like that. For example, not everyone knows you can only interact with the NHS app if you live in England. And if you follow the news you won't have to wait long before a reporter, presenter or journalist happily mentions 'the NHS' without clarifying they're talking about England and nowhere else (they're probably unaware of this themselves).
Efudix then came into our conversation. Hopeful I could have another go with it, I told her I'd found it helpful in 2022 and it was then followed up with some zapping from the second dermatologist. When she asked me how often it had been applied, I proudly replied: "Daily, for 28 days."
Let's face it, that was quite an achievement. I'd lost most of my former scalp in the process. In order to ensure she was impressed, I added: "A field treatment." I hadn't missed a single centimetre. The bots would be so proud of me. I'd followed the links and done my homework as instructed. What a good patient. Very compliant.
Unfortunately, being impressed was the last thing on her mind. I'd just ruined her day. She stood up, took a good look at my scalp and sat back down with a shake of her head before informing me that a field treatment destroys healthy cells and should be avoided. Oh dear. I'd done right by the bots but wrong by the second GP. It sounded as though they did things differently in New Zealand.
Efudix, it seemed, was about as welcome in my new GP practice as the plague. I was firmly told they only ever prescribed it to be taken on three alternate days a week, for the maximum permitted four weeks. Monday, Wednesday and Friday were the favoured days, presumably so it wouldn't mess up your weekend as well as your scalp. As far as the second GP was concerned, Efudix was off the agenda.
This practice had a protocol and it was to be strictly followed. The first step was a gel called Solaraze. "Much gentler on your scalp," she enthused. I'd never heard of it (I'm an Efudix groupie after all) but it was obvious I was out of options and had to give it a try.
She told me I'd need to apply it twice a day, seven days a week, for an initial period of four months. This seemed like rather a long trial period to me but I guessed I could get used to it. The next thing I knew, I was being 'counselled' that some people needed to try it for eight months before the desired results were achieved. Good for them.
Then she observed that the new lesions were on the top of my head and consequently a bit awkward for me to see. I might find it tricky to hit the right spot and keep my applications on target. Was there someone at home who could apply it for me? No, I live alone. Did I have a friend who might be able to help? Hardly. They're hundreds of miles away. Twice a day for four months and possibly longer was also causing problems for me. I was unconvinced that even the strongest friendships imaginable could survive an imposition like that. Frankly, the suggestion astonished me, so I simply told her I was sure I could manage with a mirror or two and we left it at that.
She then informed me that the practice had a GP who specialised in dermatology and would review things in a few weeks.
This would be the third GP in this story but I already knew her from a previous consultation for an unrelated matter. And we had history.
