My nan got diagnosed with terminal cancer in January and to this day I still find it hard to get my head round. I wake up every morning hoping its just a bad dream... but its not.
She brought me up from the age of 18months old - she has been someone to talk to, lean on, share great experiences with and just love me for who I am. I will never forget the day of when the news was given, my mum broke the news that she had cancer in her femur, on her lungs, liver and lymph nodes. That day my heart was broke... my mum then added that the doctors had said it maybe a few months or maybe even a few weeks. She came home but I noticed certain things.
I have tried my hardest to go to my nans with a huge smile on my face being strong as I can be for her and trying to spend all the time I have left with her. Then we got given more news, this month my nan was diagnosed with dementia too.
It is so hard being strong for my nan and my grandad as well as all my family.I try to help out as much as I can with my nan by feeding her and sitting with her and cleaning their house, but i still feel I am not doing enough.
Emotions are all over the place Im angry, upset, fearful and lost and I really hate feeling like this. It is killing me inside. I go to councelling once a week but I still feel thats not enough :(
