Been a litlte while but this stuff keeps you busy right?
The second round of chemo was pretty much worse than the first but he recovered a little quicker after it. It seems that maybe it is the chemo causing the symptoms after all but as he's just started his 3rd treatment I'm guessing we'll find out soon.
Because of the unexplained symptoms with the first round, the onco kept him on the 75% dose and upped his dex from 1mg to 2mg to see if that helped. He hadn't really bounced from the first treatment, and although he was better mobility wise, he was still struggling with conversation which was his initial symptom. His MRI was booked for the week before his next treatment date.
He started his 5 days of chemo on the Wednesday and by Sunday he was shaky, shuffling like a 90 year old man, not very aware of his surroundings, not hungry, and pretty much unable to communicate. Monday and Tuesday were pretty hurrendous. He couldn't keep a thought in his head, didn't know whether he'd eaten or not, hadn't taken his meds. I think he lost all sense of time. Toward the weekend he started to come round, he did some housework on the Thursday.
The next two weeks have seen him bounce back so much better. I've been able to talk with him properly which I haven't really been able to do since before Christmas. We've not got as far as deep and meaningfuls, but its helped with little things.
I've told him straight that if he nosedives this time he's coming home with me. It's horrible that he lives to himself and makes me feel like a monster for leaving him. He won't budge on the moving in thing though, and I don't blame him, just my own guilt for whats happening to him.
The blessed relief of this is as awful as it was to witness this independant man lose all sense of everything including himself, he doesn't actually remember it. He doesn't really remember seeing the onco or rather what she said. He doesn't realise how far down he dipped, when we were talking to the dr this time, hearing about it was a bit of a shock to him i think.
So after discussion the doc has decided that we'll try upping his dex to 4mg for 10 days during treatment and give him the full dose of chemo. So far so good, but really its how he is from tomorrow that counts. Fingers crossed though it may be the difference. The dex made such a difference from day one, I don't think he'll be able to come off it again. I don't know wthat that means though. Is there always fluid on his brain?
Final note. The scan results were described as satisfactory, but it was kind of said in the way that your worst teacher talks about you at parents night. As in, i'm not allowed to say anything bad so we'll describe you as barely meets the standards and move on.
I don't think its good news to be honest, but I didn't feel strong enough to push and didn't think that he is strong enough to hear about it right now so I left it. I mean the only thing they could do at this point is stop treatment and she was very eager to get him onto the full chemo.
She said that the tumour was still there and the scan results were a baseline for the next one post treatment. If I was to guess I'd say optomistically that we're in the same position as post surgery, although realistically I think that we're looking at there being more of something, maybe pseudo progression? It would explain the short term memory loss etc as he didn't have that before treatment. Who knows? If he's better after this week, then mayeb we'll ask. Most likely we'll get through the treatment first and get the full skinny after the next scan. That way if there's anything to worry about it will be with reason rather than for nothing.
Hope all you guys are ok out there!
