So, I've not really been on here at all for a month. Does it sound harsh or uncaring to say I'm all cancer'd out? Probably a bit I guess. People who were on the boards when I first started reading them died. So awful and heartbreaking, and I didn't really like the glimpse into the future that it gave.
Dad got through the final round pretty much unscathed. I joked at the start that we'd have it licked by the last treatment and its true we did! We found that increasing the steroids for about 7 days during the chemo worked well and stopped the fuzzy loss of awareness.
Unfortunately Dad has blown up like a balloon. I'm hoping that its steroid related as its all water retention. Fingers crossed we can reduce the steroids and alleviate some of it. The problem being that every scan so far has shown fluid on the brain. He's also fallen again and ripped the skin on his shin. Because of the fluid it's going to take forever to heal, so that's 3 visits to the district nurse a week for the foreseeable future.
He had his post treatment scan last week which took forever and it's clinic day tomorrow so hoping that the news is good. I don't want to lose hope this early, although it's nearly a year now. I never took the prognosis as a definite but to be honest, unless something miraculous happens after being a few weeks past treatment, I'm not sure there'll be anything to celebrate. If I'm honest I'm really scared.
I wish I could explain to people what its like being a part of this, but I guess its one of those things that you have to experience to get. I can talk about Dad's illness very matter of fact, very detached from the emotion, and cancer has just become part of daily life. Then in the most surprising and unexpected moments it just smacks you square in the face that its actually happening and the end result is that I'm going to lose my Daddy :(
