Dad's admitted again....

1 minute read time.

Had a really hard day yesterday, dad was in distress with his bowel again over night so I rang the specialist nurse who arranged for dad to see the bowel consultant later than day.  Probably one of the worst appointments we've had.  I know i've said before that we have an understand with the oncologist that he doesn't tell us anything we don't need to know, his aim is to keep dad positive.  We cannot control what other consultants/doctors say.  So the first thing he says was 'you know we cannot cure you'.  Well actually no we didn't know that, we know his lung cancer is incurable, but that's it. 

The consultant said they cannot do the stent for another 2 weeks and he won't make it that long, the pressure in the bowel and risk of perforation is now too great so full surgery.  Oh you are going to remove the cancer?  No.  That is major surgery with a long recovery, lots of risks that we cannot take.  Chances are dad may never leave hospital and would never return to chemo.  Lovely thanks.

So they're going to do a bowel bypass and create a stoma.  Dad looks confused, and he said a bag.  Dad is shocked and said ok, can they can be reversed though?  I'm sorry but we will never get to a position where it can be reversed.

So dad is going in at 10am today for surgery tomorrow.  Chemo will be delayed for a further 2-3 weeks, but I don't mind the break in chemo if something is happening to improve dad's quality of life.  We've already lost 3 weeks and he's endured a week in hospital for now what appears to be nothing, why they couldn't do this surgery then I don't understand, but I suspect they wanted to avoid surgery as much as possible.

So a horrible day, dad is as deflated as a burst rubber ring and I feel totally blown away and really worried now.  Pants xx

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Molly,

    Really sorry for all what your Dad and you are going through. Wishing your Dad all the very best for his op tomorrow.

    LM is right, the bag should make things a bit easier for him, there are a lot of us baggies out their, we just hide it well.

    Take care, and big hugs to you.

    Tight Lines

    Tim xxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Molly

    Sorry for both you and your dad,having a rotten time of it. Hope all goes ok tomorrow.

    Keep your chin up and as well as caring for your dad, make sure you care for yourself too, hard I know, be kind to yourself.

    Jackie xxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Molly

    {{{{{Massive Hugs}}}}} to both you and your dad.  I hope all goes well tomorrow and as LM says, if it relieves your Dad of pain and discomfort it will be worth it.

    Stay strong and try to keep smiling hunni!

    Much love,

    Nin xxxxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Thank you everyone, your support as always makes me smile and gets me through.

    He's still waiting at the moment, cos it's emergency theatre it's waiting for a slot.  The anaethetist came round and was talking about protecting his lungs during the operation, probably because of his lung cancer, hope it's nothing to worry too much about.  They've said they'll attempt keyhole first which make me feel better, less risky and all that, just hope they can.

    I'll certainly be taking dad in a few small beers next week no doubt, he disguised one in a costa cup last night!

    Thanks again everyone :) love and good health to all xxxx