The Demise of Roland Ratso: Chapter fifty one.

2 minute read time.
We went to the Rushcliffe Park at Ruddington but I was unable to walk from the car park to the playground because my back is aching so much. It is far worse than the “old injury during the pit” pain that I normally get and it is very frustrating. It stops as soon as I sit down. Eleanor had a great time on the park with Jonathan and she came back to the car and we had an ice cream. She really has been very good except for swinging on Nanny’s new kitchen stools where she knocked her boiled egg off the plate. It’s now Wednesday and she has gone back home. Irene has just shouted upstairs and asked me what I was doing. She says it has gone awfully quiet and I agree. On one of our canal boat holidays we were locking through one of those middle of town locks. It was a beautiful sunny Sunday afternoon and there was a tea shop lockside with quite a few customers. We were stood on deck waiting for the lock to fill when Alex started waving his arms about saying that he had got a wasp or bee in his big bushy beard. His wild gesticulations induced panic – especially with Irene – and then he said that the wasp had gone up her shorts! She dived down into the boat and dropped her shorts, taking them off looking for the insect just as the boat rose level with the tea shop and spectators, and there she was stood in her knickers being viewed through the boat’s large picture windows, performing to a round of applause! Alex has never quite been forgiven for the panic he caused claiming that there WAS a wasp and he DID think it flew up her shorts. Others might take a different point of view. There is still some residual pain in my derriere although nothing as bad as when it was in full (radioactive) swing. I am farting like an old trooper with full confidence that I am not going to “follow through” and the smell resembles a proper fart and not how it has been. I finished my chemo on Saturday – four days into non-chemo but still feel rather different. Peace and quiet now Eleanor has gone might give me a chance to recharge my batteries but she is coming back next week. Yippee! _______________________________________________________
Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    When you had'nt posted earlier on, but alas all is well, well as weel as can be, you'll be missing your wee grand daughter, the fantastic bit about grandchildren is that they allow you to become a child again & behave accordingly, lol, as the saying goes Drew..... heaven is a dry fart, look forward to your bloggs on a daily basis, keep up the good work. Laura

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    The problem is I am in between treatments - I have no chemo for another week at least and my first slice of radiotherapy is finished so it's not so much Roland's demise at the moment and I struggle to find topics that will engage people. No doubt after I have been back to the "factory" on the 17th there will be a lot more material (maybe literally) to write about!

    Keep smiling

    Love

    Drew

    X

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    The great thing about your blogs is that it's the everyday things that make it so interesting. I love hearing about the club, and all your mates that go there. You'll never run out of 'material', it's all there in your memory. Happy Easter

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Let's hear it for normal smelling farts without lumps in them!

    My friend has just been diagnosed with cancer of the rectum. He's just started chemo and radiotherapy this week so he's got it all to look forward to. I'll tell him to join up to this site and read your blogs. They'll cheer him up. (Or finish him off! He's still reeling from an exploding colostomy bag - while they had visitors!)

    Best wishes, Shelagh

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    You make the day to day mundane aspects of life entertaining.  Love hearing about the family - how Irene puts up with you boys is beyond me !!