I know that over the next few months, during this intensive treatment, there will be many ups and downs. I will probably see many changes in myself both emotionally and physically.
I no doubt, will have very 'wobbly' days when I will feel very upset and overwhelmed. I used to feel guilty for feeling this way as I know I have been told that the aim is to 'cure' me and to remain cancer free. I know there are many fellow patients out there who are in a much worse situation with their health and the outlook is less positive. I am starting to learn that as positive as I can be on most days, it is ok to have days when I feel upset and not be afraid to show this or feel guilty about it.
On the positive side, though my looks and emotions may change drastically over the next few months but what will not change is the people around me, my family, my friends, who may not realise how much their love and support has made me strong and carried me through this. I keep being told repeatedly that I am brave but there is only one reason for that and it's not down to me, I am only brave because I am being held strong by all the people in my life who mean so much to me.
'You can choose your friends but not your family'
They say you can't choose your family, well if I could, I would choose them over and over again. Love within a family is unconditional and I realise and felt that more than ever before. Yes you choose who will become your friends and I would say I am very fortunate to have such caring and supportive friends in my life. This is enough of a reason for me to keep strong and to keep smiling..
