Struggling

Tashajade, my darling, we all feel your pain and grief and send our love and condolences. 

Do not feel guilty,  your mum wouldn't want you to,  so stop. You obviously loved your mum an awful lot and she must have loved you  back ten times more, as a parent I know.. and I wouldn't want either of my daughters to feel guilty when I go. I don't know how long I have left, I have cancer, but seeing my children  and talking to them every day makes it easier. Your mum wouldn't want you in pain and guilt, you must have been very close .    I am trying to help, to find something to say that would comfort you, from my perspective,  I would be happy and smiling to have the love you and your mum had.  Its hard and life goes on, so chin up young lady, make your mum proud. Much love xxx

I do feel for you as I lost my lovely mum too from the same cervical cancer I now have. I was 16 and she was only 45. The only thing I can say is that is does get better as you learn to live with the awful pain and it lessens as time passes. The pain and sense of loss you feel now is absolutely normal. It sounds as if you had great times together. Cherish those precious memories x