Well I'm 18 years old now and still find it hard to cope with all the different thoughts and feelings i hold about how my mum passed.
When I was 11, my mother was diagnosed with Leukaemia im not fully aware what one it was however i know that it was the moment my life and my 3 younger siblings life's would change forever.
My father would take my mum to hospital for her chemotheraphy, and all was well she was still herself. Then the side effects kicked in and she began to loose her hair. This was hard for me, as i sat in the dull plain beige painted room whilst watching my mother golden locks being shaved off. I was never alloud to visit my mother when she was in a London hospital. I hadn't seen my mum for almost 16 weeks, because her immune system was so low, we didn't want to risk it.
In April 2003, my mother passed away, leaving four children behind.
I miss her more and more each day. but what more can i do i just have to look after my younger siblings.
Why am i writing this blog?
I am currently studying my A Levels, and i need some inside information on the different effects it has on familys and the grieving process.
I Give great condolences to anybody who has lost someone so close to them.
Take care and thank you for your help.
FormerMember
Dear Comfort
I read your blog and my heart went out to you. I have two daughters, aged 19 and 15, and I too have been diagnosed with a terminal cancer. I am sure your mother would have been (and is) extremely proud of you.
My daughters are slightly older than you were at the time but the pain we have all experienced since diagnosis has been something we would never want anyone to suffer. As a mother, there are feelings of extreme guilt at your children having to live through this and extreme sadness as a mother that you may not be there to watch your children become adults.
Although your mother is not with you physically, she will always be part of you and the fact you have obviously grown in to a very caring young woman shows this.
I am sure others will be able to help you more that I can and I wish you well with your studies and remember your mother would want you to achieve everything you want to and be happy in life.
I was sad to read your story and I can understand a little of how you are feeling. My father was taken ill with a heart problem when I was about 11years old and I spent the rest of my childhood expecting him to die at any minute. He survived so many heart attacks but got weaker with each episode. When he did die I was 19 and I can't tell you how shocked I was to hear the news. Because he'd recovered so many times I began to think he was immortal. It's been over forty years since he died and I still remember him with love in my heart. Remember your mum in the good times.
