I have just spent the morning at work providing beauty treatments for several clients, I'm now at home listening to my delightful children arguing and throwing cushions at each other. Its just gone very dark outside and a rumble of thunder just resounded near by. I can hear police sirens in the distance and the downpour of rain that has just begun. I'm wondering if my son is ok at his friends house and what I am going to do for dinner as I need to go shopping. I'm thinking about phoning mum to see if she fancies 4 more for tea tonight and my little girl is crying because they wanted to get sweets but its now raining so we cant. Welcome to my life....
The point is I cant imagine this ever coming to an end, I cant imagine becoming so ill that I can no longer be a part of this, I just cant. It doesnt seem real. Even when I get the pains in my chest which I know IT is causing me and I when I feel the lumps in my neck and know what they are. I wonder will it ever seem like any of this is really happening to me? Going to the hospital having endless tests, scans, being prodded and poked, operations, appointments, results......the list is endless. All this has become as much a part of my life as washing up, cancer is no longer my enemy its part of me til the bitter end.
FormerMember
Hiya,
Im sure fed up with hospitals and doctors looking inside my mouth. Im on the other side now as I was a nurse, I somehow thought that I was immune to the diagnosis of cancer for some stupid reason maybe as Im the youngest of six and the others are all ok. Mind you I did have cancer at the back of my mind as my mum died from pancreatic cancer at the age of 51, I thought maybe I would get something around that age, but no a huge op on my 44th birthday last year to save my life. Its not a world I like to be in, but Im taking one day at a time and trying to make the most of them. Enjoy everyday with your wonderful family and maybe join in with the cusion fights dont try and think too far ahead just enjoy the hear and now. Take care Ruthxx
I just want to say that your life sounds beautiful. I sympathize in how you have to get prodded and poked and everythign at the hospital but apart from that,I think your life sounds wonderful.
Chin up, like Ruth says, don't think too far, being positive helps a lot. Have fun with your kids, go mad with it. Don't let it bring you down!
