My Reluctant Journey.

1 minute read time.

Well, This Is It .. I don't know why I have been chosen to take a journey I have no wish to go on - BUT this journey is here for a Reason?  Be it for me or for someone else.  Is it a punishment?  I don't know!  Is it as a reason for something that happened in my past? A beastly side effect for all of the experimentations of having IVF x 6 tries - IVF was full of Hormonal starts/Hormonal stops and other awful drugs which pushed my body to the limit and sadly for me, it never did result in my having any children.  So, it seems that I am trying to make some sense of what is happening to me - I feel like I have already started Dying!  Does anyone else feel like that?  I see that look in people's eyes, when you tell them you have cancer and they look back at you and you can see DEATH staring you in the face because that is what people think the minute the word CANCER is spoken. Lucky Me Eh?  I have known about this illness for just over a week and  it is a lonely illness because it is within yourself and no-one can share the burden of it - they can share kind words with you but can't lift it off of your shoulders.       This is my START and I must remember to put the date first in future.  Today is Saturday 17th July 2010.  I have just had my 57th birthday, so I have had a good run, as my Mother would say.

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi.I have had 3 months now to come to terms with this, All can can say is that you look at life totally different when you have had cancer in your life.

    I have started to have quality time with my children and friends (unfortunatley my husband of 36 years left me the same week I found my lump) but the time I share together  is so good and we do things we would never have previously do.

    Thinking of you chin up.

    Janet X