After getting diagnosed 4 weeks ago, I've had to have a CT and PET scan to see if the cancer has spread. Today I'm back at the hospital to see the consultant for those results and to hopefully find out the where/when/what/why of my treatment plan.
My positivity is playing a really shitty game of hide and seek with me today. One minute I'm feeling good about todays appointment - the first step to getting rid of this cancer. Then the next minute I'm petrified and imagining being told the cancer has spread. You can live without boobs. Liver and lungs are a bit more essential to survival.
Right, off to go seek out where my optimism and positivity are hiding.
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It's now 15 hours since I wrote the above section.
The good news is that my cancer hasn't metastasized into any other organs or my bones. This news made me so happy. That was a big fear of mine, finding out it was elsewhere. I was told my cancer is a Stage 2, Grade 3 Invasive Ductal Cancer. I'm HER2 Negative and the cancer has a positive reaction to oestrogen (8/8) and progesterone (3/8). However, I'm shortening all that to Adolf. An evil little fucker who wants to take over but will be defeated!
Nothing about me is dainty or petite, and that style carried through to my cancer too. The mass in my left breast is 80mm. That's about the size of a Penguin biscuit bar. And the crazy thing is, I still can't feel it when I have a prod. The mass in my armpit/lymph nodes (or axilla as I learnt it's medically named) is 50mm. So these cancers are pretty sizable. Because of this I will need chemo to shrink them before surgery. I have an appointment with the oncologist tomorrow.
