Do you find people are walking on eggshells around you? they don't know what to talk about. I post regularly on another forum and I had a pm from a member apologising for being insensitive about something he wrote along the lines of taking the p**s. I replied to him saying no special treatment and I'm handling this thing by taking it out of myself. I was looking froward [I said] to all the nurses nursing my wedding tackle, sod's law I get an Anne Widdicombe lookalike. Sorry Miss W you may be my political ally but no way Jose in the other department.
I missed The News Quiz this week so I can download the podcast and have a couple of them to listen to when I go in for the op, I just love Sandi Toksvig's humour. It's a must do every week to catch this programme.
But real life goes on bubbling along underneath all that is happening. Sometimes I even get an hour or two I don't think about cancer and then life comes first. Loads to do and get prepared for. I was asked about my household arrangements by the Jackie my Macmillan nurse, where was my bathroom and bedroom and other things like that. That set me to thinking about what I may not be able to do in the immediate time when I come out. I always see my own invincibility and it's an "O.K no problem I'll do that" but maybe I can't so all my ironing and washing to be done, freezer full, loads of associated tasks to deal with. It will keep me mad busy because next week is also quite a heavy week on the work front. I'll be spending a few days on some film work in Liverpool (I'm in the coach business btw) and also need to get the jobs organised for when I'm in hospital as well.
My sister in law works in the hospital I'm going in to, she's a ward hostess, or as she says a glorified dinner lady, on the ward I will be in. OH NO I've tasted her cooking before!!!!!
FormerMember
I think i know what you mean, only the other day i asked my youngest Son had he spoke to any of his friends re his Dad. His reply was briefly to 2 of his mates only and those are 2 he's known since nursery Days. My Son is 21 and has a huge friends network from school uni pubs n clubs but what he said was most mates have a wicked sense of humour and he didnt want any of them to skirt around him. He also said his dad would be the same and he's exactly right. I couldnt begin to tell you about my husbands wicked sense of humour. Even in this darkest times for us as a family he can still joke at his own expense. He embarressed the oncologist the other day when he made a joke and she didn't see it as a joke at first.
But thats us as a family and Tom wouldn't want it any other way.
Chin up sorry about the anne Widcombe look alike sort of thing that would happen to Tom lol
Hi Bren - yep, I've experienced lots of people walking on eggshells at or around me. I try to be as understanding as I can. I mean I know they feel awkward etc, not knowing what to say to me. Yet, I'm STILL Kate, so what's changed? Cancer! That bloody word conjures up such terrible images in their minds that really, by the time they've gotten around to talk to you - you are CANCER ON LEGS - Boom, just like that, your identity has flown off somewhere else as far as they're concerned. I do try to be patient, but God, it is very difficult sometimes. I had one person come up and say to me; "oh I'm really sorry you've got whaddyacallit"!!? I now doubly appreciate my family and friends who are quite content to let me talk of cancer (which I decidedly try NOT to do), if that is what I want, or who are just happy to be in my company.
You come across as a bubbly fun loving person ( I too LOVE Sandi Toksvig's humour), who is quite prepared for what could lay ahead for you. Be very, very careful what you say about your sister in law's culinary skills - should she find out, then your stay in hospital could turn out to be a stay with little or NO food heading your way, lol I wish you all the very best, I hope all goes well for you and please keep us updated on your progress, ok? with best wishes and lots of love kate xxxxxxxxx
How I agree!!!! In fact, I'm doing everything to avoid everyone treading on them so I've already decided not to tell any of my family about my diagnosed bowel cancer until I get my operation date - then I'll have to tell them (but only because they'll all wonder where I am when they visit the house!!) I've managed to have all my procedures: seigmoidoscopy, catscan, mri, colonoscopy IN SECRET - taking early morning taxis to and from the hospital to avoid disclosure. The self-medicated enema was a hoot - I was expected to visit one of them that day and just said that I had a bug and couldn't get off the loo - which wasn't far off the truth!!
I honestly think that telling my four sons has caused me more sleepless nights than the bloody cancer!
Keep that sense of humour - at least they can't biopsy THAT!!!
