I got through the MRI.....!

I really don't know what all the fuss was about - however, it was what happened before and afterwards that made me laugh - eventually! I took the whole day off work, today. It's not far from here to Salisbury, but I wanted to 'prepare'. I had no real idea what to 'prepare' for - I'd never had an MRI scan before - but the thought of 'preparing' seemed like a good one. So, after a good long lie-in, I got myself ready for the journey. Nothing to eat for six hours before the scan so, with a one o'clock appointment, egg and bacon for breakfast was out. Even a slice of toast would have been welcome - but no! I must be strong. It's only a couple of hours. A sort of sideways glace at the mobile phone on the dresser and my mind went into overdrive. I suddenly had less than an hour to drive to Salisbury, get parked and find my way to Radiology!!!!! Panic immediately set in. Where had the morning gone? Grab a bag with all my documents in - and a pair of metal-free trousers to wear for the scan. Whoa – Stop - now there's a thing! Have you ever tried to find gent's trousers with NO METAL in them? It's nigh on impossible. Yesterday, I looked all through my wardrobe - basically several pairs of jeans in various colours - and nothing. They all had studs or trims or buckles. And they had zips! Mostly big metal ones with teeth that pinch if you get it wrong. But even the plastic zips had metal sliders! I had nothing non-metal. Eventually, having exhausted my wardrobe and thinking of turning up dressed in just my underpants, I had dashed off earlier this morning to Sainsbury's to see what they had. There, right at the back of a shelf, right at the back of the shop and - I swear to you - still priced in shillings and pence, I found a pair of 'leisure trousers'. They would have to do - so a fast dash to the checkout, eyeing up the cashiers to find one who didn't look like they would pick the garment up by one grubby corner and screech to her Supervisor to get her a bar code Back home and try them on – they fitted, just, but were a bit too short. (Come on Cross – you’re 56 years old. Your days of worrying about Street Cred are long since past) They would have to do – I’ll change at the hospital. Anyway, stuff the trousers and papers in a bag and rush out to the car. Calculating the drive time as I sat down, I was at the point of realising that I would need to drive like Jensen Button to get there on time, when I happened to glance at the car clock. Then I took out the mobile phone and looked at that. Back to the car clock. No….. So I turned on the radio. Yes, you’ve guessed – for some reason the phone time was an hour ahead of ‘real’ time. It was two hours before my appointment! So what do I do? Drive ever so slowly to Salisbury? – No, that’s not my way! Take the long way round? – No, that doesn’t work for me, either. There is nothing for it but out of the car and back indoors for a while. When I finally made the journey, I got to the hospital with plenty of time to spare and made my way to the MRI Suite. Although I was half an hour early, they accepted me and started to talk me through what was going to happen. They de-metalled me and told me to empty my bladder – I’d had nothing to drink for – by now – ten hours, so it was a bit of a struggle, but I obliged. Then in for the scan. What was I worried about? OK, it was noisy, but that was all. It was strange, almost surreal. But – no matter what – it was a half-hour lie down. And I love laying down! In what seemed like no time, although the Radiologist said he thought I dozed off, it was all over. Then off to another part of the hospital for a flow test. Yes – that’s right. Nothing to drink for ten hours, evacuating my bladder before the MRI – and I had to do a flow test! Take me to the water cooler…….and just leave me leaning against it! The nurses were brilliant. Very understanding. I had to drink 12 – yes twelve – of the plastic cups of water before there was even a slight twinge of needing to go! Then the nurses sent me out for a walk – just to make sure I didn’t go into retention – whatever that is. But I performed. True to form, I did as I was told! Now it’s just wait for the Consultant to get back to me. Oh, and by the way, I had to stop twice on the way home. All that water certainly found its target! More news soon. Much love Steve