How do you cope when the doctors cannot do any more treatment?

i am so sorry hear about your mum and I wish I knew what to say or do to help in any way to make things feel a bit better. I got diagnosed with a rare cancer this year and my dad refuses to talk about it. He lost two sisters to it and I guess he just doesn't know what to say or how to handle my news and that's just his way of dealing with it. This wonderful site has kept me sane. I have made good friends here and we all support each other in one way or another. It's also a great place to offload, especially when all you want to do is yell at the top of your lungs, 'why?!!!' Stay close to this site and keep posting. I live about 25 mins from Brighton

lots of hugs Mei x

Beth

I have just read your post, that must be heartbreaking for you. My mum has terminal cancer of the lung with a secondary on her spine and scapula. She is just about to start chemo and I am petrified of the thought it might not work and what is ahead. Have you thought of keeping a diary and talking in it about how you feel and remembering happier times and memories of the time you and your mum spent together?  you could write letters for your mum that your dad could read to her. I keep a diary and find it really helps but at the end of a very emotional entry I always write 5 positive things about my mum and that makes me feel so much better. My thoughts are with you and hopes this helps you need to remember that our lives still have to go on and with a distance that large it is so very hard to stretch yourself in all directions by sending letters and writing your thoughts down really helps xxxxxxx  Vicky x

Just be there whenever you get the chance

Tell her how much you love her and how lucky

you are to have her for your mum, I lost my son 8

months ago to secondary breast cancer, he was

my world he told me constantly that he loved me

and I him, my world has fallen apart but i am glad that I was there every second of every day.

Take care and be kind to yourself

Much love

Irene

This morning i decided to jump on the train to nottingham. I got at about 2 and went to visit my mum inhospital and stayed till about 830 with my Dad. He insisited I didnt 'waste'  my money coming up to Nottingham but i know he really needed the company. Seeing her how she is, not talking and barely keeping eye contact was very ard to deal with. I just needed a cuddle and to be told that she loves me but I know she can't. I had a good old cry with my dad so I feel better for hat. We've talked openely about the funeral and i think we are preparing oursleves. I think the hardest thing for me is worrying how my dad and my mums best friend will cope. I worry more about them than me and i wish i could fix it for them.  

Thankyou to everyone who told me to be there wenever I could. this gave me the push to go up this weekend and although it was hard, i wouldve regretted not going.

So pleased that you went Beth, you know how much your mum loves you and how proud se is, our love is unconditional and for eternity, you will never be prepared however much you try but you and your dad will get through the tough times ahead I promise you that as "I know" Take care Beth am thinking of you

Love and hugs

Irenexxxx