Is it normal to give in to the tiredness (or am I just a lazy bum)?

I'm so sorry you are going through this horrendous experience. Unfortunately, the chemo has a cumulative effect and the side effects tend to worsen as time goes on. Tiredness is one of the most common side effects and having been through it the only advice I would give is to lie down and rest when you require it.

I am six and a half years since diagnosis and I can tell you I still tire very easily. I was also diagnosed with M.E. about four years ago, so that certainly doesn't help matters.

Fortunately I have a husband who is really understanding and supportive.

Perhaps your partner could do a bit of research either on the net or in the library on the side effects of your treatment which would make him realise you are not being lazy or selfish. Perhaps even if you have a macmillan nurse he/she could find him some info on this.

I'm sure your partner is very frightened by all this himself and sometimes if we are frightened it can come out as anger or frustration.

I hope things settle down for you soon. Hopefully it won't be long till your treatment is finished and you can start to recover, which, I have to add, won't be overnight. So, take whatever time you need to get fully fit and if that includes resting and sleeping, so be it!

Best wishes, Christine xx

Hi there...i had chemo and like Christine...i suffered from fatigue...and still do some days...and i was told not to fight it...give in to it and sleep or just rest if thats what i needed to do...you are certainly not lazy....you are going through a tough ordeal...and like Christine said...maybe your partner is frightened and frustrated..but unless you have been through chemo you really cant understand how it feels...and its so difficult to explain to someone. Again i agree with Christine...get some info on the effects of chemo for your partner to read..maybe it will give him some insight...in the meantime...sleep and rest as much as you need to...take care....love Sharon xx

Hi Ya Kalanika,

Naw your just a lazy Bum.  Joking aside you will feel tired for a long time to come.So when your body says rest you rest.this tiredness thing Ive had it now for 12 yrs and still tire very easily. Its something you are going to have to get used too and it wont be easy. So all the best.

Take care and be safe Big Hugs love Sarsfield.xxx

Hi

I am currently going through chemo and am always saying that my mantra is 'if its a good day get up and do something, if its not stay in bed'. I have found this works for me and fortunately my days have been more good than bad. I have just had my 4th chemo and I am finding the tiredness hits me more each time therefore I rest more. I don't think you're being lazy and there's nothing needs doing that won't wait so take it easy. Perhaps your partner is worried or afraid and your being in bed makes him more aware that you're ill and if you're up and about he thinks you're ok, just a thought.

Wishing you well

Maxine

Hi there

I am a carer and my partner experiences the very same problems as you do.  He often spends whole days on the sofa and finds it very hard to do anything.  I've accepted this as a side effect of the chemo and let him rest when he needs it.

We've found that the first week and a half is the worst, after which he regains a little strength each day and manages to do little jobs and venture out for a short walk.  We make the best of the good days.

As for your partner having no sympathy.  I'm sure he does in his own way but perhaps he's finding it hard to accept how ill you are.  I don't resent John feeling unwell, but it does stress me out and I get a little snappy at times thinking that he might be exagerating his symptoms.  

Sometimes it seems that all I hear about is how unwell he feels and he catalogues each and every symptom of his cancer.  We live and breathe cancer on those days and it's hard to lift him out of it.

Cancer is certainly taking a toll on my mental and physical health, so perhaps your partner feels the same.

Lastly, don't feel guilty about feeling so tired and you are NOT a lazy cow.  You must rest when you feel the need.

Hope this all makes sense to you.

Take care.

Love and *hugs*

Marjorie x x x x