Its Starting Again

Hi Alan,no wonder you are feeling so down, hearing that a friend had died with the same cancer as you must have made

you very scared. But you have to stop to

think about yourself and the fact that you

are not sleeping will pull you down and

leave you open to picking up colds plus

not sleeping can affect the way you think

and well you know that everyone's cancer

in a way is different to how it affects the

body. You said in your profile that being

in remission has made you change in

someways.[not exactly your words], but

your friend passing away has now made

you feel less confident about yourself, and your cancer is now playing on your

mind. I know you cant help the way you feel at the moment, but remember you

fought this cancer , so dont take to steps back. I really do understand how you are feeling, cancer is a wicked B------d it

not only takes over your body it plays with the mind as well. Go to your GP and

ask for something to help you sleep, i am

sure he will understand , after a couple of

good nights sleep you will be able to take

stock , and hopefully get that fighting

spirit back again. Dont hide yourself away, when your up to it go out with your friends, talk about your feelings, grab your cancer feelings by the balls

and tell it who,s boss, you can and will

win the battle, i know you will.

Sending you big hugs.XXXXX

Lucylee.

Hi Alan

Do you see a cancer psychologist, My Husband has AML. He was feeling what he could only describe as the night time dreads whe he did not want to sleep for fear of not waking up. I requested a Cliniclal Psychologist  fo him (against his better judgement he said it is only people with Mental Health problems that see Psychologists). However he now has Esther  who I can only describe as an Angel , she sees him in hospital and she also comes to the house to see him when he is home.

As for you workmates/friends at a time like this yu find out who your true friends really are. You are better then them you have managed all this time without their help and you will continue to. We are in the same boat the friends we have had for years can't handle Berts diagnosis as can't some of the family well all I can say to that is  our friendship is their loss not ours, we has been fighting this for 14 months and have survived without them. On the other hand we have made so many friends especially here that makes up for the loss of the others.

I hope yu manage to get some decent sleep things always seem better after a good night sleep,

Take care

Love Teri

Hi Alan,

It's me again, your fears are understandable, i just hope you can find the strength to take 1 step at a time. Don't run but walk.  I'm thinking of you and wishing you well for your future.

xxx Reneesha  xx

Alan, Not sure if it helps, but was talking to a friend the other night about her best mate who had cancer. We were on about the lack of friends (well I was moaning actually to be honest) regarding my sister. Anyway she said she used spend hours inher garden trying to drum up courage to see her friend with C as she was so scared of saying the wrong thing. Said I'd spouted a load of bull***t to my sister (that's having read on here what people don't want to hear). I agree with Babybear about friends, but I think sometimes you do have to make that call and if you get no response from them then you know for definite who your true friends are. I've always said to people (& my sister I'm there if you want me @ anytime), but she doesn't always call so I have to keep an eye out so she she doesn't play the martyr. We just need a prompt and an opening sometimes to come forward.

Babybear- I'm glad you pointed out about the clinical psychologist as this is something I will enquire about for my sister. We think the depression & anxiety may be chemically induced due to her chemo etc,but this may help her deal with everything.

Regards to all, Jewels X

Just to echo what everyones saying Alan, you know were all 'terminal' whether we have cancer or not or 20 or 80. Dont let the fear take away your present lad, love and blessings to all, Karen xox