Doug would have been 54 today, we always went away for the weekend for our birthdays and I cannot help but wonder where we would have travelled this time. Two years ago on his 52nd we had a wonderful weekend in Brighton of course last year he was not here and little can I remember anyway.
Today I was expecting to spend time remembering in my own way this morning and then to potter on into today as I usually do on days I don't work. What I was not expecting was the overwhelming feeling of being alone today. Its as if he had just gone not some 14 months later!
Today I feel like I have been frozen in time - cannot move forwards and of course I cannot go backwards....coping with the memories and tears is just about tearing me apart.
I know that tomorrow I will feel better but today....go away!
