19 weeks in...depression settling in too...doctor has increased antidepressants but i am not sure they are the answer. The tablets suppress all emotions so i cannot be happy if i tried to. Going on holiday in 4 weeks and really not bothered about it at all. Daughter number one emigrating at the same time and daughter number two off to university so by end of September I will have lost my husband, my dad and my two daughters will not be around. Aint life grand!
FormerMember
Hi i to suffer from depresion and tablets are not the answer ive been taking mine for 40 years at first they seemed to work but you just get addicted to them try and remember so of the good times you had.
Hello it seems so much is happening to you all at once,and that your daughters moving away from home feels like more loss on top of loss if that makes sense.Tablets have their place but as you say they are not the whole answer.I don't know if you have considered counselling it may help it does for many.Of course it doesn't change the situation but it can be a place to get all those thoughts and feelings out a place to talk freely about how you feel.I can only guess that you possibly keep a lot to yourself rather than share your thoughts and feelings with your daughters so as not to have them worry about you when they leave.Possibly like most mums you will try to send them off with a smile and a don't worry about me I'll be fine when really your not.I can only send a virtual hug but it is a warm and meaningful one Cruton x
What a lot you have had to deal with in a short space of time. It is totally understandable why you feel like you do. And then it seems as though nothing stands still for long and you must deal with more things on top of everything else. I'm glad you're writing a blog, because maybe that helps get things out of your system.........?
And Cruton's wise advice about maybe seeking some counselling............ Well, I can only say that having someone I talk to about all the feelings and emotions has helped me a lot. Because there are things you can't tell anyone else about, aren't there. Except, you can tell us....... Out here there are a lot of us on this site who understand because like you, we are making our way in a world which seems at times oh so harsh and cruel. We do it one step at a time, one day at a time, and when things are very tough maybe just one hour at a time..... We go through the motions because that's all we can do to start with. But gradually, there are little changes. There are even better moments - yes, it's hard to believe, but there will be....... for you, for us.
Be gentle with yourself, be kind to yourself. Don't expect too much of yourself. But from where I stand, you are 'doing it,' treading the path we are all treading........... Be of brave heart...........
Hello, I really feel for you. I am new to this site myself, I joined to see if it would help me cope better. I read your blog and it is understandable that you are feeling so much pain. I am feeling pain too, but I know it isn't depression - I have had depression before and know the difference, this is enormous grief and yours could be the same. Let me share my story in brief with you: I am an only child, although now an adult with my own family, in March my Dad died of cancer just 3 weeks after diagnosis, I went through so many emotions but thought I was coping well, I put all my strength into looking after my Mum, then 12 weeks later on Fathers Day my Mum was diagnosed with the same cancer, no treatment. I am trying to cope, sometimes the pain is unbearable and even with my own family it cannot take that away. I think being an only child also makes it harder as nobody I know is going through the same grief. So I share with you the pain of losing a parent but cannot begin to imagine how bad you feel about losing your husband. I also have 2 children, 1 is going to university in September. Your children leaving is a big wrench at any time and you have had too much to deal with to react the way you normally would - which would be upsetting anyway. I hope you had your holiday and could find some moments to enjoy it a bit. If you have depression the tablets may help but they have their side effects. For me I am on a rollercoaster of emotions, sometimes a zombie and other times can function normally. I would say if you can't ever function normally you are depressed as well as grief stricken. I know there is nobody that can take my pain away and that I have to go through the emotions and hope I come out the other side in one piece. I have a bereavement counsellor that I think helps and some good friends, everybody says it takes time and to go through multiple losses must take longer. Keep strong, I'm trying to.
