Today’s title is a song recorded in 1967 by one of my favourite artists. Chris Clark. Not many people have heard her music which is a great shame. She never got the recognition she deserved. She’s from the same era as another favourite of mine - Dusty Springfield, and Chris Clark has a fine voice too. However I do know someone who loves 60s music as much as I do. Let’s call him D and I have his permission to share his views on how dating has got more difficult since the good old days of vinyl. D is recently single again and is struggling to find that special someone.
D tells me that relationships used to be so much easier when he was dating the first time round. It was so much easier to judge a person. You would meet a girl, lets call her B, and invite her back to your flat one afternoon to listen to some music. It was clear to both parties what this invitation meant. These were innocent times. D would have cleaned his stylus and tidied up his record collection. He would have also got the kettle on ready to make the coffee. B would knock at the door with a large carrier bag containing the vinyl she had selected to share. If D was lucky then B would also have bought something nice to eat, perhaps a pack of chocolate biscuits or some cake. This would show thoughtfulness and generosity.
D would offer B the chance to examine his treasured record collection. B would be instantly judged on the way she performed this task. Would she handle the vinyl with care, and treat it with the respect it deserved? Then it’s time to put on the first LP. What to choose? B is given this honour. So does B suggest they listen to one of D’s? Does she select one of her own albums, but pick out one she knows D will like? Good moves, showing consideration and ability to compromise. Or does B selfishly choose one she has bought that she now knows D hates?
So some music is appreciated, coffee is drunk and it’s time for B to go home. She will fully judged over the next few days. She will tell her friends exactly what she thought of the afternoon, and D will get to hear about it. He has his spies. Will B say anything to hurt his feelings? Has she been gossiping a bit too much? But for now D wants to get an idea of how B feels about him. So he asks if she’d like to borrow one of his albums? Yes please says B. Perhaps I could pop it back next weekend? So now they both know they like each other and would like the relationship to continue. Easy.
So why is poor D struggling? He’s recently met Y. He really thought she was the girl of his dreams but he has clearly misjudged her. They have been out several times but never been to D’s flat before. In these days he doesn’t think you can ask a girl to your flat for a drink and to listen to music on a first date. The time has finally arrived for her to be invited. Vinyl is kept under lock and key these days but there are plenty of CDs. D had provided wine and some snacks. (Like the sound of the prawns in mini filo pastry parcels D! Where did you get them from?)
The evening did not go well. Firstly Y muddled up the contents of several jewel cases, even managing to damage one or two. Several were misplaced back into the collection which due to size has to be kept in alphabetical order. Loose CDs were carelessly thrown down onto the rug where they attracted fibres. To D’s horror Y proceeded to take a CD out of it’s case with greasy fingers. She then used it as a drinks coaster! Her final error was in stating that Matt Munro could not sing. Made worse by stating that a certain auto-tuned talent show contestant had a far superior voice. She will not be invited again.
