Is it really 6 and a half months since dad died?
Who would've believed that in the last few months my life could change so radically? I feel like a whirling dervish spinning, spinning, SPINNING!!!
A month after dads death I met up with the love of my life again after 12 years. The only man to ever break my heart and still make me go all gooey even after so long. He had come out of a very messy marriage but had two beautiful boys who made me laugh.
We talked a lot and decided to give it another try. If dads death had taught me anything it was that life is too short to pussyfoot around so grab what you want with both hands and enjoy the ride.
Three months after dads death I was engaged - 24 hours after his divorce was made absolute. A month after that we were (officially) moving in together into a 3 bedroom semi and being a happy family.
Our 1st Christmas together was wonderful and awful at the same time - I loved our first Christmas together but I hated that dad wasn't there to see it.
I am now preparing for a wedding in May 2011!!!!
Why couldn't this have happened while dad was here to see it and enjoy it?? I know my wedding day will be another filled with joy and anguish. Can I really go through with all of thoses faces of joy but eyes of despair 'What a shame her dads not here...'
Feeling very messed up and convinced people think this is some sort of bereavement reaction. I know its not. I always said that when I settled down it would have to be total and complete love or I wouldn't marry.
