Be careful what you wish for

Well my oncologist or is it urologist ( can never remember which one seeing me, i know it wasn't the haematologist as i saw him in the morning) popped his head round the door to give me an update on my treatment, Its still working, yay, but even though i didn't ask what my tumour markers are down to it seems they're still far from normal, but going down. So i took a deep breath and did point out that the original plan for my treatment was three cycles of hdc with stem cell transplant, and was it possible to have a go at extracting enough stem cells after this cycle for a third transplant. I think he knew this question was coming as I've been asking the haematologists during the week Yes he said it is possible , we have to make that decision after this cycle, He then explained it may not be worth it I may get a serious infection during this one, and a couple of other reasons (I did like the one you never know you may not need it) But at least it was not a straight out no , but did i really want to wish on myself a third month of HDC, Hmmm well yes and no, if i have to have it and can have it i will as if it works come october and beyond the treatment will start to fade to bad memories and a bad two year period will be dismissed from my brain Although i still was hopefully thinking he say that i don't need three, but then who wouldn't? but at least they have not taken away that option just yet which i'm very relieved to find out. So we shall see, here and now i just have to get though the next 9-10 days, Maybe i find the indoor swimming pool in that time.