Struggling waiting diagnosis

Mack1 said:

so will definitely lean on my missus I just hope not too much for her sake.

Don’t worry too much. You’d be surprised how well carers cope. We have quite a few here at the moment, our indefatigable Gill H 

I'm sure you're braver than you think Patrick. You may well surprise yourself. 

Just keep talking  ... its important. Don't bottle things up.

I'm sure your wife is made of strong stuff ... she's already giving you the lecture bless her

Lean on each other, she will need support at times as well  Xxx

Thank you & to Dani also.

I'll be honest she is made of a lot stronger stuff than me - sure don't they say opposites attract. 

Lol!  Thanks Dani, but I'm really a daft boiler who never knows when to button it and thrives on small doses of kip! xxx

Hi OzStu.  On the whole I agree, as I'm a realist too, but...if everyone held the same attitude, what a miserable horde of buggers we'd all be.  And that, my friend, would eventually shut down forums like this, as no-one likes to wallow in the thought that the grim reaper's hanging around, waiting to dish out his calling cards.

On that cheery note, I'm sending you my best wishes that you can whack the GR aside and find your miracle, as many on here seem to have already done.

Hugs and strength Ozzy, or Stu xxx

Sorry I'm a bit late to the party here as there has already been heaps of discussions that I have missed. Being a realist is great but but no one really knows what will happen in the long run and I find dwelling on it is not good for my mental health.I have adjusted pretty well to the changes in my life as a result of cancer.  I don't stick my head in the sand and know that with my history I have a high chance of another occurrence but prefer to put that on the back burner and enjoy my life how it is now. I have never asked my doctor for stats as I don't want to know as I would find that all too gloomy and take the shine off the extra 2 chances I have already had at life. I intend to enjoy each day as it comes and not miss out on any opportunities. I am now 71 and had my first op for jaw cancer when I was 59 so am thrilled to have made it so far. I have my fingers crossed for more years still but not wasting my time  worrying about that.  Life is for living so I want to get on with that. 

Lyn

Hi Gill sort I’m late replying Bern in garden and allotment. Yes she’s lovely she’s a bit cold compared tj Dr Sen but I got on well with her. Give her my best wishes she will remember nd a the girl ( lol ) who rides her bike in Spain and fitted ent visits in between.  
how did yih get in 

hugs Hazel xx

Hi there Hazel.

We got on fine and Miss Farrer was really pleased and said we were doing everything right.  It was a really quick appointment - fifteen minutes in total!

Yes, she was a bit quiet, the total opposite of the lovely Dr Sen, but we trusted her completely and she was very competent.  As soon as I mentioned you, her face brightened and she went on to tell us how much you do for Pinders and helping with awareness on various things.  Well done, you, you're renowned for all the right reasons!  I'd recognise you from your photos, so if I ever see you there, be prepared for a gobby old boot's approach.

Love Gill xxx

If positive thinking make you do all you do in getting on with life as you are,  thats great.  I find that knowing the facts and hire dire it is and accepting the reality of probably recurrence actually makes me more proactive.  For example,  when I fount out I had cancer 5 years ago I stopped smoking straight away.  Later down the road I found out that my cancer was not caused by smoking, and it was hpv virus that caused.  I would  have had it if I had never smoked,  just as half the other patients I met and chatting to did. So, one night I was having some drinks,  first time I'd had a beer in over a year......light beer too.  But the booze bone is connected to the smoke bone and cravings started roaring while have a drink and playing pool.  At that point I knew that my cancer had been caused by hpv, and I'd make it past the real danger zone of 1 year, and was clear,  couple months past my 1 year pet.  Everyone around me was smoking,  so I just said, bugger it, I'll just a couple while I have some light beers and and socialize tonight.   That first drag was like renuing an old love affair.  I smoked 3 smokes that night.   Then it started.  I never got back to a pack a day.  But I smoked a few smokes a day,  one after meals,  sometimes one before I want to bed.  The really tough ones to do without.  Then I switched to vapes for a while as was to quite again.  I fought this on again off again  battle with smokes for five years,  floating between being a non smoker and a social light smnoker,  but never a heavy smoker again.   My past cancer never back...........but I got somethings worse...........p16 negative.......most likely from smoking.  No,  if I had of never developed this confidence that I had beat my cancer and was home free, and maintained my paranoid believe that it's a matter of time before I'm screwed,   I would have never stuck a smoke in my mouth again.  So you see, negative thoughts can also keep you from harm..

I know now that there is no such thing as just have a couple of smokes and no more after being a life long smoker.  I'll be addicted again to some degree after even on smoke.  It's like being an alcoholic.  One drink and they are usually off the wagon, even after years of non drinking.