Hi everyone,
Having floated around reading posts from all you lovely people on here for a wee while I've finally plucked up the courage to join in. Here's my story so far...
A bit about me first - I'm 57 and married to my soulmate. Have two beautiful step-daughters in their 30s who lost their mum to BC 10 years ago. So this makes it super sensitive for them. I run my own design consultancy and marketing business - so that's going to bring its own challenges. No sick leave or sick pay!
So here's the tale so far: Found a lump in my right boob at the end of May and having had a cyst there previously thought this would be the same. It wasn't - within less than a month it was biopsied and I was having a lumpectomy and SLNB for what I was told was a small (18mm) Grade 1 Invasive Ductal with no sign on scans of lymph involvement, good prognosis. Fast forward to 10 days after the op and I was told yesterday that it was in fact 24mm, Grade 2 and cancer found in 2 of the 3 lymph nodes biopsied. The cancer is ER Pos and HER2neg.
I've decided to go for an Axillary Node Clearance which is happening next Weds. My previously biopsied nodes have been flown out to the USA for the OncotypeDX test and they'll test the remaining nodes removed next week. Then decide on initial treatment - chemo was mentioned plus radiotherapy. The cancer is ER+ and HER2-
To say the already shaky ground I was standing on now feels like it's collapsing is an understatement.
I think the worst thing for me is not allowing my mental demons to take over - as a graphic designer, I've already designed my funeral order of service!
I guess I'm hoping chatting to women in a similar situation to me will help bring me back on to more solid ground mentally. Having had a not great but positive initial diagnosis, only to find it's not as positive as we thought has totally erased all the hope I had. And now I'm crying again - how much crying can you do before you start to crisp up?
x
