Support and a friendly face (even virtually!)

Hi Amy. Thankyou for your lovely comments. I don’t consider myself brave - it was more a case of having to do what I had to do - there was no real choice in the matter. 

Yes I think you really need to speak to the consultant about Johns condition as he needs to be in a better place to start treatment. Emphasise how much his condition has changed over the last few months and how weak he is. Fortisip are little drinks (bit like actimel) which are high in calorie so the idea is that getting one of those down can be a 200 calorie intake. Some taste better than others but I was given a selection when I had them. Hopefully the vomiting in the night was caused by the vile stuff that you have to drink before the colonoscopy and will have settled down a bit now.

There’s some good ideas in this link for getting extra calories into food although it will be hard if he is struggling to eat anything at all. Personally I would forget about healthy eating for now and let him have whatever he can face. If he wants a plate of mash then let him have it but try and put some butter and cheese in to up the calories. I’ve heard others say that they enjoyed fish finger sandwiches with mayo and butter or little desserts with cream.

https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/impacts-of-cancer/building-up-diet

Please don’t ever apologise for posting - we’re here for all emotions and the good thing is that we’ve been there, done (or are doing) that and we get it. 

Big virtual hug on the way and keep going - we’re right here with you 

Karen x

Thanks Karen.

Firstly, you ARE brave and strong - I won't listen to anything different! Oh - and I'll add kind to that list, for being MY support these last couple of days!!! I don't even know you but please know how much you have already helped, just by being my ear!!! 

Well after I messaged you things changed - John was super sick another couple of times (where is all this food coming from when he has hardly eaten for over a week?!)

Anyway - long story but the end result is that between me, the consultants secretary and the GP, we managed to get John into the Acute Medical Admissions Unit.

I drove him down there earlier - we got there just gone 5pm and I've just got home. 

Hardest thing ever leaving him there but I'd have ended up in the ward next to him if I'd have stayed. I wanted to stay long enough to get him through triage so I could explain everything - John would just say his stock answer - I'm fine!! Why are men so stubborn??!! :)

I've not eaten a thing all day (still can't face it), I've been awake for god knows how long and I'm just completely shattered. Plus we have a little dog who has spent far too many hours in the car today!!!

Although I feel guilty leaving him there I know he is in the right place. 

I just called and he's still waiting to see a doctor but they've put him on fluids. Before I left the nurse said his haemoglobin levels had dropped again (lower than 3 weeks ago when they were 104) - so perhaps they might arrange a blood transfusion which will hopefully give him a boost too.

Anyway, I'm off to bed and will keep you posted.

Thank you again for being there Xx

Well done Amyx . What a rough day for you both but you got him to the right place .

Hope you both get the rest you need tonight .

Court 

Thanks so much Court. Worst day of my life - but I know he's in the right place now.

Looking forward to a good sleep thats for sure!

Amy Xx

PS Loved reading about your moms journey - made me smile before I go to bed xxx

I have spent a lot of nights in Acute receiving units , wonderful as they are it’s heart breaking but fluids and the correct intervention can turn things around quickly .

Mum has had her share of emergency admissions but I remain amazed how they turn her around . Takes a wee while but she gets there and her team has been fantastic. 
Hope you get a good sleep . It’s all so draining .

Court 

Well its 4am and I've just heard from John.

They have found a tumour in the colon. They are about to give him a blood transfusion. He's still in a chair as a bed isn't available. He's so tired and overwhelmed with it all

The surgical team are planning to talk to him soon I think but they are definitely keeping him in.

I have had about an hours sleep and have given up trying so I'm having a cup of tea and trying to get my head around everything. 

I'm so glad he's there and after weeks / months of uncertainty we know what has been causing all his problems but on the other hand I'm scared of the journey ahead. 

Amy Xx

Just read your story and wanted to reach out and tell you how amazing you are doing! You might not feel it but what I’ve read you are super woman. My dad is in the same position as your husband, with the eating and drinking constant cramps and feeling sick he’s been like it since last week. His is from his 2nd round of chemo it really took his toll on him. We finally managed to use the helpline to give him something to help, so I hope you can get something just to ease and help him. Sending love you’ve got this xx

Hi Amyx

This is a horribly tough, uncertain and stressful time for you both.

Hopefully your partner's surgical team will swiftly confirm what they are going to do and that your partner will get a bed in the most suitable ward.

I know it is hard, but please also allow some focus on your own needs and wellbeing at this time. Looking after yourself will enable the strongest possible you for the journey ahead. Both you and your partner will reap the benefits from your self care.

Good luck to you both for now

Oh Amy. I am sending you the biggest virtual hug - what an exhausting couple of days you’ve had. I’m so glad you’ve got him into hospital. I know it’s so hard but it really is the best place for him and now they’ll set the wheels in motion to get the correct treatment. 

Hopefully they’ll find a bed for him and then get him onto a ward. Did you manage to pack a bag for him? Earplugs are handy and an extra long charging cable so he can reach it from his bed. Sorry for being practical but I can imagine your head is cotton wool at the minute - no offence!

Please keep us posted and, as Crumpets says, try and look after yourself too. There will be difficult days ahead so take a deep breath and remember that we’re here and thinking about you

Take care

Karen x