no further treatment

1. Hi Sal1,

I am so sorry for what you are going through, it is absolutely heartbreaking watching your loved one fade in front of your very eyes, but you are truly being so brave and what you are doing for him is so selfless.

I feel like we are at similar stages with our experience. My husband has become very weak in the last few weeks, particularly in just the last week. He can no longer walk and can barely even sit up without my help now, and it takes two of us just to get him up and out to the car to take him to hospital. His breathing is very laboured and he constantly makes strange noises in the night so I am watching him like a hawk. 
Like you I am keeping my husband at home and doing all I can to keep it that way. I am accepting any help offered by different support agencies and am currently awaiting calls regarding how they can help.

I worry every night when I go to sleep that this could be the last night I have him with me and I worry about how I will deal with that when the time comes. But as you have said you just seem to find an inner strength.    There really is no way of knowing how long this will go on for but as medics now also seem very concerned I feel like things are happening quickly.

It is such a huge help having you all in here to share these experiences and my thoughts will be with you all. I shall continue posting no matter what happens.

xx

Dear Sal and Bramblejoo

Your words are so emotion provoking for me, I know that sometime in the future this is possibly going to be me using similar words.. but for now, please know i am here praying for the strength you have found within yourselves to continue. Praying that as the most difficult of times dawn, that your loves always know you and are pain free.

As I have mentioned before, there are never the right words.. but I am truly thinking of you all...

Sending Strength.

Lowe'

• Thank you Lowe. I am not at all religious but just to know others are thinking about me is a comfort.

i left my husband in the care of the hospital today after he had a drain fitted, they are keeping him in overnight to monitor him as he is so poorly. I have called the ward a couple of times and his blood pressure is very low so I will not sleep well tonight waiting to hear that he’s got through the night out. I shall call them early tomorrow to find out. I feel as he is now he can’t go in much longer. It is awful to watch and feel helpless.

Sal1 hope that things are going okay for you as much as they can be.

Budge - hope your call went okay.

x

I know you’re not ok, I can only imagine how you must feel but I hope you get some sleep because then at least you won’t be worrying every minute and the night will pass faster. Take care darling, much love xx

hope your hubby is ok xx

Hi, you’ve been in my thoughts what a night you must have had, how is your husband doing? xx

Bramblejoo

My Prayers go out to the universe 

I hope that your night gave you moments of rest at the extremely difficult time.

Thinking of you and sending stength.

Lowe'

Hi all,

Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. Although my hubby did make it through the night (I called hospital at 6.30 this morning) sadly he was so weak by then and they actually called me back just 40 minutes later to say he had passed away. Very suddenly but quietly and peacefully and with the lovely nurses caring for him as he took his last breaths. To the end he was thinking of us and not wanting us all crying around his bedside and having to watch strangers take him away from our home. He walked out yesterday with our help and when I left him at the ward yesterday he was comfortable, in no pain and glad to be there and be cared for. He squeezed my hand before I left (something he hadn’t done for a while) and told me he loved me.

I have lost the love of my life, soul mate and best friend but know in my heart that he wouldn’t have wanted to endure people coming into the sanctuary of his home to care for him, that just wasn’t him.

I spent the day with family but am now home alone as I felt the need to be here with just myself, our lovely dog for comfort and my own thoughts.

Please cherish every moment with your loved ones as that time is so precious.

x

Dear Bramblejoo

There are no words at this time, other than maybe the knowledge that the end was peaceful may be something of a comfort to you. . I can't imagine how difficult these past few days, weeks and months have been for you, or how the Now and coming days will be.... I can only send my love, my thoughts and my sincere condolences..

Thinking of you at this very very sad time. 

Lowe'

Thank you x