New to Chemo/hospital systems/jargon

Yes it’s not a journey we signed up for. 

Hi - it's good that you've got the initial flurry of tests out the way but I totally understand the wait problem.  We all hate the waiting!  It's the worst part.  But equally as its holiday season I'd expect radio silence right now.   I coped by telling myself there were lots of other people on the list and I had to be patient (pun not intended!).  Also that a two week turnaround was a sprint in terms of NHS response and adjusted my expectations accordingly.  But this stage is really hard.  Try and take it one day at a time, then by the w/e that's another week closer to the next phone call or appointment letter.  This strategy got me by.  If you can, plan activities and at the end of the day you might find "that was great - I didn't think of the cancer all day".  

When diagnosed we (husband + I) quickly realised we knew nothing and had to wait for the treatment plan to be agreed.  We told no-one until after I started the treatment.  People have very different strategies about telling friends and family, specifically when and what or even if at all.  There is no right or wrong answer and no size fits all.  But right now I suggest you consider who you tell because your approach might change in 8 weeks.  Mine certainly did - only 2 friends know what's going on.  

And on the "control" thing - you're absolutely right.  Cancer and "having control" is something we all encounter, and have to come to terms with, on many levels.  

I'd also suggest you connect in with the relevant cancer type group - they are really informative because you connect with people who have the same treatment/issues.  Also there is a chemo group, and one for supporters/family/friends.    Wishing you all the best of luck and lots of engagement very soon.  

I've been waiting since having breathing problems back in March 22. I've had PET CT scan - not seen oncologist. The letter states the Lung cancer nurse was present. She didn't bother to introduce herself. Or even speak to me...

I just thought I'd see my children marry, have grandchildren and retire in Whitby. All looks bleak tbh. I've seen chemo from family members - are you having chemo atm? How is it?

I’m finding keeping busy by making a list of jobs to do is helping but it’s not easy. I’ve learned from my past that I need a support system around me if I’m going to cope at the best level at the time. When we got the initial diagnosis we kept it between us and immediate family. I know that due to my own health issues we need a network of support for driving, shopping and then the friends you know will be able to cope with you at your lowest, luckily we have this. But, and it’s a big but we don’t want to overburden or call on these friends too much as I’ve seen it with others not everyone can cope or want to be involved and as time goes on they withdraw and after all they have their own families and commitments.  So far only closest friends know and they are being fantastic.  

I'm no good at waiting... wish they'd tell me either way.

I have the same issues with the waiting , although the tests were only done a week ago it seems like for ever. I have started getting pains since a couple of days back but the painkiller seems to work. Very difficult to get comfy for a good nights sleep though & I can't sleep in bed due to pressure on my lower back. I don't know really what type I have yet so can't join a group, but have a good idea. You are so right about who to tell or not & how people react. I am lucky that most people have reacted well & are supportive. I am on my own but find it is good to talk to the supportive family that I do have & friends. One day at a time & keep occupied seems the best thing. Take care & best wishes.

it's been dragging on since March last year... hopefully a yes/no soon x I've told 1 friend