Hello and coping advice

Hi good luck for tomorrow take a note book and pen if you are like me once they start talking everything they have said goes over my head and when I get home I would kick myself as I would think why didn't I ask that question and so on if you get my drift told you everyone would rally round for you xxx

Popcorn is right, write everything down. Ask them to repeat or explain anything you are not sure about. If it's a phone consultation get someone  with you and put it on speaker. If it's face to face, get someone with you.

You're at the bottom, let's get you up a bit.

Hi Tdas. I'm in a similar situation to yourself. just coming to terms with the fact the cancer I thought was clear from has popped up and spread significantly. To hear and read those words knocks you for six but gradually I'm coming to terms with thngs.

Just had my first chemo treatment on 6th December and it hasn't been quite as bad as I thought it'd be, days 4 - 11 quite rough but do-able. Now, apart from tingling in fingers most side effects gone. I'm also not popping co-codamol for the pain every few hours. I just have a 5ml spoonful of morphine before bed and last night slept through from 10 to 6.30 - a record for me.

Don't lose hope, you'll get shed-loads of support here and my anxiety has lessened. I admit I have a little wobble every so often but I wouldn't be human otherwise.

Sending hugs, Barb xx

Hello Tdas,

How did you get on with your appointment? Feel free to share anything on here that distressed or confused you. As Norberry said, we need to try and get you into a bit more positive frame of mind so you can get something out of the holiday and see your way ahead. I hope that some of that numbing shock has started to pass.  Thinking of you and sending you big hugs and positive thoughts. Rainie x

Hi Barb

Thankyou for your support and glad your treatment was not as bad as expected. I'm definitely going to the worst case scenario for myself in every situation - I guess it's a protective mechanism so you can't be floored again by some new awful news but I can see it's not helpful in day to day life. Hope you continue to feel and sleep well over the Christmas period.  x

Hi Rainie

Thankyou for your message - The appointment was not as awful as I'd anticipated.  I think he was waiting for me to ask about life expectancy but I didn't as I know what he was going to say and for me it does not help me to keep hearing the worst case scenario. I've already been there in my mind. They are going to start me on immunotherapy early in the new year - I have loads of info to read when I have the headspace to take it in. It did make me feel less anxious to have a plan of treatment even though they are obviously making no promises as to whether it will work and also threw a huge list of terrible potential side effects at me. To be honest, in my position, I'm prepared to accept any risks to have a bit more time with my boys. Thankyou for your hugs and positive thoughts. I'm still obviously very up and down and the shock of it all still keeps hitting me but finding moments of calm in between. Thankyou all for your support. It really helps. x

It's a plan, we love a plan. That means other people do the research and work out how they are going to treat you and you get the benefit of their labours. I can't say sit back and enjoy it but it seems to me you are in good hands.

Best wishes.

Hi Tdas, it's good to have a plan...i am on immunotherapy to, and was given 8-12 months...well that was now 6 years ago...i'm still stable mable. So go on and join me please. Best wishes, Pet

Hi 

Thankyou - I needed that today. X

Hello Tdas,

I feel your original post completely after shock diagnosis just last week. Palliative chemo only to prolong life a little. The anxiety is crippling but some wonderful members here reached out & replied to my posts. It has certainly helped me continue putting one foot in front of the other. I’m hoping you’ve found the same kind of comfort Xx