nothing to look forward to

Thank you for your warm wishes . I understand your predicament, it's really harsh. It's a horrible situation to be in. My heart pours for you. You appear to have a grit determination, so try ignite it and tell yourself I still have lots to live for. Lots! Keep it up. 

Dear CJ,

It is very difficult at the moment in this current crisis and even more so for people in your situation.  There was always a proviso in the shielding advice in that anyone who believed that they had less than six months remaining to live might choose to take the additional risk and meet others if they decided that was appropriate.  I think that this was probably in order that people had the opportunity to get the support they needed as they approached their death but also so that families had the opportunity to say their good byes.

I am not aware where you or your son live but you might want to consider meeting up with them.  If you have been isolating then you are at little risk of passing any illness onto them.  It is then a matter of how much risk you think you would be at from them.  If your son is a front line worker then these risks may be higher than you would want to chance but if he has been able to work from home and lives in an area with a low rate of infection then you might think that the risk is worth the benefits you would accrue from meeting him.

Hopefully things are starting to ease off again at the moment although obviously there remains a risk that, like in Leicester, the restrictions may be tightened up again.  I am waiting the government announcement today about which countries we can travel to without the need to quarantine on return to see if I will be able to travel away with my family at the end or August or if Ii will have to ring up my travel company and forfeit the deposit by cancelling.  Not such a big decision as you are facing but it is difficult to get it out of my head.  At this time I'm not sure if I want to be able to go or not.  Having spent so long socially isolating the thought of getting on a plane and travelling abroad causes a bit of anxiety.

Wishing you all the best,

Gragon x

Dear Rafs

Five in the morning and lve been on this site all night looking for this ( although obviously l didnt know it til l saw it) 

l'm refering to the " Just one job to do and thats to get better" That's brilliant, and the rest of your post is exactly what l need to hear

l had major surgery in April and now l'm on chemo, to be followed by radiotherapy and l can do with a rest 

LouEbella! I'm so sorry for you, can imagine how terribly horrible you must be feeling, and it's keeping you up through the nights, that really is a nightmare. I take Mirtazipine to help me sleep at night and Lamotrigine in the morning to help my cognitives. Being wide awake at night makes it so difficult to deal with things, and that alone is stressful. Perhaps discuss with your Oncologist, he/she would really want to be of any help possible.

I cannot fathom the pain and stress you're going through. It is unimaginable to me. For the cruel and crass cancer to spread must feel like you're fighting a bulldozer. But I'm moved by your deep and very strong will to not give in or give up, you are brilliant (although, I know, you never feel good or take credit for this fight, you just see the part of you that is pushing you to give in).

I wish I knew what I can tell you that would help you further but you've conveyed a lot to me. 

And of course, you have one job and that is to get better. Keep focused and don't, please don't ever feel bad or blame yourself for anything. Nothing. 

I wish you every avenue of hope and blessings, 

R

Dear Rafs.

l have to level with you and tell you that l accidentally messaged you in this group. When l read it l just stared at it for ages, not realising responding to it would take me to this group. I had been using 'search' option. Like l said l think it is brilliant.l have screenshot it so l can remind my self to be kinder to myself and prioritise getting better. But lam so sorry to have encroached on this group when l shouldn't have done, as l am not terminally ill.

Thankyou for taking the time to respond this morning. lt is the kindest thing l've ever read and you have really helped and inspired me when l was feeling really low

LouEbella,

While I'm pleased to hear you're not considered to be in this community, living with cancer, facing it and staring it down is inexplicably difficult. 

Everything has a reason and I'm glad we did have a conversation. 

Wishing you well to have a smooth steady recovery. 

Rafs