The cat was the final straw.

Oh Lass, I'm sorry things didn't go a bit better at your meeting! I actually related to a lot said! I am allergic to the contrast dye used for scans! I have IBS and can easily clear a room! What meds did they give you for that please? I was given Amitriptyline for nerve pain and was like a zombie. They lowered it to the minimum dose of 10mgs and it still knocked me out. I told GP I didn't want to take it as I wanted to be in control and not be controlled by a drug which is why I don't sleep much. Why does no one check what you can and can't take with liver problems!! I think you and me are the only ones who read the leaflets you get in the boxes!

Onword and upward with your next appointment! Good luck!  Now regarding a dress for the wedding, it's not you who is at fault, it's the designers. Have you noticed no matter how many shops you try, everything is much of a muchness! Some of the styles I can't imagine anyone feeling good in them! You'll find something! I'm sure as long as you are there, you're brother won't bother much about what you are wearing!   

Heya Tina, 

I was started on the lowest dose of Amitriptyline, still knocked me out. Lol. Good to see it did to Annette too, as with CFS you never really know.

The thing with a wedding rather than friends getting together is there are pictures taken to be looked back on and hung on walls etc. And this is the brother who sent me the book for my birthday last year on how to healthily starve myself thin. So I can see him not having me in pics or cropping me out so I don't make him look bad or ruin his memories. (But thank you for calling me a radiator, made me tear up. It the first time I've been called that and it not have anything to do with literally how hot I am!)

Back pain is weird. It's now radiating into my left shoulder and tingling down my arm as if there's a nerve involved. So off to see a doctor tomorrow morning just for peace of mind before the party on Sunday in case I'm asked to pick up a Nibling or get involved in whatever is happening!

Hey Annette,

The pills they've given me are called.... Mebeverine. Mean anything to you? 

Today a final delivery arrived from Yours. Now, I don't know what shape they think women are, but it's certainly not the shape of any woman I've ever met! One of the dresses I ordered in 2 sizes as I'm on the cusp of both. There was 0 difference in the sizes around the abdomen and bum. But the chest, OMG the chest.... I'd post pics if it wasn't obscene! On the larger dress, the cups for my boobs hung down to my tummy button! It also didn't meet in the middle, and just hung to either side of my bust it was huge! So then I tried on some fancy tops, thinking I could do a nice top and some leggings with heels. Well.... Apparently my bust is too big at the widest part, but too small higher up towards my chin where there was excess material. Then there was one top, I could have fit another two people into around my midriff, but it was too tight across my back and the armpit was halfway down my side! This try on session wasn't depressing, it was hilarious because everything was so very comically wrong!

And see above in my reply to Tina about how my brother will feel about how I look. To sum it up, probably shame. 

Lass

Xx

Lol. Saw the GP this morning. Was sent to the hospital for Xrays as after an examination, he doesn't think it's a pulled anything. Plus, I jumped a mile as he pressed on a couple of places in my spine. 

So 7 to 10 days for the results, until then nothing too strenuous. So that's trampolining and tunnel crawling at the 5th birthday party out..... Lol. Like that was ever in!

Lass

Xx

Hi Lass

I was going to say fingers crossed on X-ray results but then I realised I wasn’t sure what might constitute a “good” result. What are you hoping for? I imagine some kind of clarity into what’s going on and some relief from pain as a result? But I could be wrong. 

Did you find anything funky to wear to the party? I’ve had to give up wearing elegant shoes as my feet just won’t take them anymore and I never know from day to day how swollen they’ll be. So I’m thrilled that trainers and skirts or dresses is now a look. I have bought some totally funky trainers with faux leopard skin, red flashes, gold eyelets in the laces and a gold stud on the ankle. I love them - and they’re comfy. 

Xx

Hi Lass, Thanks for the info. I thought it might have been some kind of new cure I hadn't heard of but alas it's not. Yes I've tried it but it made the constipation much worse and then I came out in an itchy rash. Within a day of stopping it, the rash disappeared! I just take Omeprozine, I think it's called! 

I hope the X-ray results give you some answers at last.

Enjoy the party! Oh and I don't think your brother would ever be ashamed of you, no matter what you wear. I'm sure he'd just be happy you were there!

Well, we are off at 3.30am Friday. The early start doesn't bother me because I'm usually still awake anyway!

Heya Daloni, 

I've no idea which way I want the results to fall either tbh. I guess knowing what I can and can't do would be a start, as I've lots to do round the house and garden that I've not done because of the pain from bending etc. As well as the worry that I could do myself more damage if I push myself.

As for pain relief, had to crack out the oramorph last night for the first time in a long time. I've no idea what was going on, but at the height I was curled in a ball in bed, seriously considering phoning for an ambulance crew. I've never felt so bad, except for my last RAI where I just built a nest in the recliner and waved at the nurses as they checked on me regularly. (Usually with RAI you're locked in your room and left to do your thing, only time the door opens is to deliver food.) But the state of the house put me off calling them, so figured I'd try the oramorph first and see what happened. 

But the oramorph did its thing, and I was slowly able to uncurl. Then after an hour or two, passed out. But it's been a very broken sleep. So not great.

Still no confirmed wedding outfit. Party on Sunday is my nephews 5th birthday. So just normal clothes for that. The plus side of not being able to walk or stand much because of my back means I sit down a lot. So funky shoes don't get a chance to hurt my feet. As long as I can literally walk from a to b in them, I'm good. Your trainers sound amazing though! Again, finding shoes that fit is an issue. Not so much trainers as I just head for the mens section. But 'pretty' shoes can be tricky as I'm a size 9 with slim feet, and the two toes beside the big toe, are actually longer than the big toe. Lol.

Need to try everything on to show Mum on Friday. Then on Sat Dad is going to run me round 2 shops to return everything I'm not keeping. Need to return it to the shop because I need the money ASAP, as all my spare cash is tied up in these clothes and next week one of my cats needs an op. So need the money back to be able to pay for that. 

Heya Annette, 

Sounds like a wonderful drug! Lol. And yes, I don't have constipation, quite the opposite sometimes. This drug is supposed to slow the gut down, which would indeed make constipation worse. So not sure why you would have been prescribed it! 

And this brother would be ashamed. The other two, no. But this one, yes. He's very much into image and being and having the best. He's weird! 

I'm not sure what my plan is for Thursday night yet. Sometimes I've slept and got up, sometimes I've just slept on the train and stayed up until then. My sleep pattern is all over the place, as is how deeply I sleep. So I'll play it by ear and see how it goes! Enjoy your holibob! 

Lass

Xx