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Stage IV Metastatic Melanoma Life expectancy

Kapblack
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My 91 year old mother in law  has Stage IV. She has a large hard lump under her left arm which, 5 weeks ago, 'burst' and now has an abscess and has continued to leak fluids. The nursing team have been marvellous!  My question is about end of life - she has rapidly gone downhill since the above (she also has fairly advanced Alzheimer's)  - she now sleeps most of the day, has lost her appetite and is generally fatigued (she can fall asleep mid conversation). Having tried to find some info on what this implies for her life expectancy, there seems to be many differing opinions out there and I thought it prudent to come here and ask for your (obviously) general thoughts?  We are due to discuss this with our oncologist next week but my wife (her daughter) is becoming quite agitated about the whole thing and wants to be able to properly plan what is best for her mum. You comments would be greatly appreciated.

  • Hi Kapblack,

    Thanks for contacting Macmillan Cancer Support and welcome to the online community.  My name’s Ursula and I’m one of the cancer information nurses.  I’m glad you have reached out for some support.

    Uncertainty about what the future may hold for your mother in law can be difficult to cope with.

    Supporting a family member with cancer can be tough at times too.  So, it’s equally important that you and your wife look after yourselves.

    Each person is affected differently by their condition, this can also depend on their age, general health, and treatment. Two people, with the same type and stage of cancer can have a different prognosis.

    Unfortunately, Macmillan Cancer Support are not directly part of the NHS so have no access to patients records that would allow us to offer you more direct information about your mother in law's condition.  The Oncologist would be best placed to answer specific questions around prognosis.

    Cancer Research UK have information on melanoma skin cancer survival statistics with specific information on survival by age and by stage at diagnosis.

    You mentioned that your mother in law has deteriorated – sleeping more, eating less and generally fatigued. It’s important to report any new or worsening symptoms to her specialist team, GP or NHS111 so these can be assessed.

    Going forward here is some information on the different types care and support available for people with advanced cancer.  An area which your wife may wish to explore further is advance care planning to help plan what is best for her mum.  Asking the specialist team or your mother in law’s GP for a referral to Palliative care for guidance with this may also be helpful at this difficult time.

    I see from your profile that you have joined the Melanoma forum. Many people find the support of others in similar circumstances reassuring to have.

    There is further information and support available through the family and friends forum

    You can also find support via Melanoma UK.

    I hope that this information is helpful. Please don’t hesitate to get in touch if there is anything, we can do to support you.

    Best wishes,

    Ursula H,

    Cancer Information Nurse Specialist

    You can also speak with the Macmillan Support Line team of experts. Phone free on 0808 808 0000 (7 days a week, 8am-8pm) or send us an email. 

    Ref/HC

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