emotions and confusion

hi not sure if im posting in the right place, but i need help with my emotions, i feel i cant really talk to anyone, my mother got diagnosed with AM last week , and i cant get my head around it she is 63 and has other health issues shes constanlty in and out of hospital with infections and i feel so helpless, I would love to be with her everyday but im a single mum and also work. im trying best i can but feel im not doing enough.  I cant focus on hardly anthing anymore since all this happened, whatever i do all iwant is to break down and cry, i usually good with emotions etc but this has really knocked me my mother and i are so close and seeing her suffer like this kills me. 

do you have any advice on things i can try with my mood and feelings, 

i keep feeling bad that i feel like this because its my mother who is ill but i feel so stressed and upset for her. 


  • Hello leopardkat and thank you for contacting the online community.

    I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling with your mother’s diagnosis. When someone we’re close to is diagnosed, it can leave us feeling powerless as we want to fix things for those we love but cancer can rob us of this.

    You’re obviously trying your best in very difficult circumstances so try not to put yourself under too much pressure and remember to be kind and patient with yourself leopardkat. It may be your mother’s diagnosis but you’re going through this as well. You’re not selfish by feeling sad.

    Remember too that this is all very new and raw for you. It might take a while to process the news and get used to your mother’s illness and talking can help with that. Do you have support around you? People who you can open up to about what’s happening and how you’re feeling? It can sometimes be difficult to talk honestly with people you know leopardkat but we’re here for you if that’s the case. We’re here to lend you a listening ear if you want to talk about how you’re feeling and want to offload.

    We also have a team of cancer specialist nurses here on the support line if you have any clinical questions you’d like to ask about your mother’s diagnosis and our booklet Cancer and Relationships is about coping with your feelings when someone close to you has cancer.

    Please stay in touch if it helps to talk leopardkat. You can call in on 0808 808 00 00 (7 days a week, 8am – 8pm), web chat or email if you’d prefer.

    Take care.

    Alex, Information and Support Adviser

    Remember you can also speak with the Macmillan Support Line team of experts. Phone free on 0808 808 0000 (7 days a week, 8am-8pm) or by email.