Fed up Friday.

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Friday 3rd February.

Well I'm sitting here on a wet miserable Friday feeling a bit fed up with myself, which is better than earlier when I was really really fed up!

I had the first session of the T chemo on Tuesday and it went ok up until last night, in fact I was feeling very good, but last night I kept waking up feeling achy and heavy and had a sore throat. My temperature is fine, it's just the chemo side effects, but today I've been feeling really down with it, sort of like I'm not in my own head. The lack of sleep really isn't helping either.

I can usually imagine myself at the end of the chemo getting ready for the next stage of treatment and picking my life up and getting on with things, but today that all seems so so far away. I don't even feel I can phone my daughters today because I don't want them to worry about me and I know they'd be able to tell I'm not happy, but I'd really love to talk to them. 

We are supposed to be visiting our lovely neighbours for dinner tonight, I was going to cancel but I think it'd do hubby good to go, my husband is so good and I do want to spoil things for him anymore. I really don't feel like eating at all, that's not like me. 

I'm hoping tomorrow will be a better day and that this is just a blip, as I haven't had too many bad days lately. 

Stop this ride....I want to get off!!!


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