Well, here goes!

3 minute read time.

Hey there everyone, I hope you're well.

I've recently signed up to the MacMillan site and am very new to all this blogging! In truth, I'm not sure what I'm hoping to share or indeed to get from it...like-minded support, advice, validation that I'm not losing the plot...or maybe all of the above!

The abridged version of the situation is as follows:

Mum was diagnosed with breast cancer four years ago and had a mastectomy, lymph nodes from under her arm removed, a course of IV chemotherapy and a course of radiotherapy. She was then given the all clear that it was gone.

At one of her six-monthly follow up checks two years later, we were devastated to learn that the beast was back. This time it was secondary breast cancer in her bone (at the sternum), her lungs, her liver and her lymph nodes. Utter panic and chaos trying to process it all, as I'm sure tonnes of you on here know only too well.

After another grueling course of IV chemo and a raft of drugs, it wasn't looking good. Radiotherapy for the bone was out, as it was too close to the site of the breast radiotherapy only 18 months earlier. We were told that it wasn't cureable but they would do what they could to continue treating it.

Mum then, under the amazing care of a professor at The Beatson in Glasgow, started on chemotherapy tablets to try and shrink the tumours. She did this in conjunction with some pain management and treatment for the lymphoedema which was now on her affected 'breast' side and some meaty steroids to help her breathing out a bit.

Six months later and the chemo tablets are shrinking both the liver and the lung tumours, and keeping the bone and lymphatic ones at bay...result! But the spoiler to this is the remarkable increase in her laboured breathing. After a series of MRI scans and tests, they've found several blood clots and substantial scar tissue on both her lungs, I think this is a result of all the medication and steroids over the past couple of years. She's now on oxygen at home and has severely limited mobility and struggles to even speak long sentences without gasping for breath. One of the clots went for a jaunt to her leg a few weeks ago (ironically on my brother's wedding day) and she ended up in hospital feeling terrible.

So that's us up to date with the medical history. I can't believe the journey we've come on over the past 4 years. We (my mum, dad, brother and I) look back in amazement when we think about how we thought the initial breast cancer diagnosis was the end of the world back then...and look what we've been thru as a family since then. We're hanging in there emotionally...just about, but mum's really having some bad days. It's completely understandable but very hard to bear all the same. The feeling of being completely useless is incredible...she doesn't want to eat, she can't be bothered getting dressed, she doesn't want to go out and we don't know what to do for the best...let her spiral further down with her depression, or 'bully' her a bit more to make her. It's just not the bolshy, gregarious, larger than life mum we all know. In conjunction with this, the three ladies she went all thru her IV chemo with have all, since Christmas, lost their battle with cancer, so I just know that's in the back of her mind.

Our GP has just today assigned her a MacMillan nurse, so we're hoping that she'll be able to motivate her and show her that her life isn't limited to a chair or a bed.

Well, that's about it in a nutshell. It sounds very matter-of-fact on paper, but I'm sure many of you out there have similar experiences. I'm so, so thankful for my amazing support network of family and friends, but I just thought it would be good to chat with some folks that have been there...I'm sure you know how it feels.

Lots of love, Jx

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi JEK, welcome to the Mac site but sorry that you have reason to be here.

    I have a similar diagnosis to your mum, breast cancer with secondary spread to liver, bones and lungs, although thankfully my lungs don't cause me problems.

    Hopefully the new Mac nurse will have some ideas that will help your mum and maybe lift her spirits a bit. It's good to know that you have a strong support network around you, that can only help too.

    Bad Fairy x

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi sorry to have to meet you but welcome anyway. This is the site no-one wants to join but if we have to then you could never wish to meet a better bunch of people.

    I hope the mac nurse's can help your mum and family.

    Love Julie X

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    hi JEK welcome to the site, i'm sure you will find lots of support here, there are certainly lots of brill people on here. with the help of the mac nurse ihope your mum and you can enjoy some good days together. take care love and hugs sue xx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi J, welcome to this site where you will meet loads of people who understand completely how you are feeling. I too had breast cancer, diagnosed in 2003, but thankfully, so far have not had any spread.

    I lost my dad to this dreadful disease in April so understand how it feels from both sides.

    I too was treated at the Beatson. Only for radiotherapy though and it wasn't in the new building either lol.

    I wish your mum and family all the very best and I am here if you want to chat.

    Best wishes, Christine xx

    p.s. A course of anti-depressants can work wonders if your mum isn't already on them.

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi JEK,

    Welcome aboard the Merry go Round. All the best and Good Luck.

    Take care and be safe Big Hugs Love Sarsfield.xxx