I am aware that some people don't like silly and want to know what they are going to read in blogland... so this one is not for anyone who loves sympathy and head tilts from people and the poor you type comments. The rest of you reporbates, another silly on its way...
I realised my last blog was getting me a telling off and I didn’t want that (and I will do less next week I promise...) so I thought I would do a quick one about today to distract you from the last one...
As I said before, we were hosting a conference at school today. It was on a project I worked on for 2 years, travelling all round Europe and it got some award or other in the end. I loved doing it. Anyway, it was on something I felt rather passionate about and something I had had to let go of and let others work on while I was ‘otherwise engaged’ with my arsehole cancer... sorry, anal cancer. Let’s be proper.
Why? Says inner LM..
True.. let’s not be proper.... arsehole cancer it is.
So today, although I was worn out and you were all worrying about me doing too much was a fun one for me cos I got to meet old friends who last they heard of me was a message that I had to bow out of the project and if things went well, then I may be able to join them again sometime in the future and if they didn’t, well... I would be joining Vallhalla instead.
Of course there would be others there too who did or didn’t know... and I got to blab on about something I liked all day which is also fun.
Two of my mates from this project are coming. Hoorah! I haven’t seen either of them for nearly a year now. One is a bloke who is big and like a bear and gives the best bear hugs ever and the lady is silly and laughs (say no more)
So Bear arrives and gives me the biggest biggest hug ever and doesn’t tilt his head at all but says all the same stuff you lot bang on about about I’d better be taking it easy etc. but best of all I get a big bear hug and I had missed them. :o)
My silly friend arrives and has a big laugh with me and gives me a big hug and asks How’s your arse? Very loudly.
This is where the fun really starts... cos everyone else is either a Headtilter or an avoider.... and as we know, there are looks and phrases that drive a loony bonkers. The ‘You are so brave’, ‘well done’, ‘you look soooo well’ , the head tilting, etc etc.
The avoiders get into trouble early as of course in the conversations comes up lots of ‘Well, I don’t know cos I wasn’t there then’ from me and some of them start to change the subject each time and look the other way etc. One woman I know a bit won’t even look at me in the eye and avoids me all day.... (I find the avoiders the weirdest I think)
All others do the Head tilt and the How are you. And then the few that don’t know me and then find out by hearing... well they do even bigger head tilts than the rest and then they all do the Oooooh you look so well.
(which is almost nice for once cos I feel like shit)
I don’t think I ever told you lot, but you can guess that I like my coffee and I like nice food. Chemo pissed me off no end cos I went off everything. I have recently got my taste for most foods back now and I am nearly back to eating like a horse including Odin’s 8 legged one....
“ Can you drink coffee?”
“ Oh, gosh please sit down.
Let me carry that mug for you.....
Can you eat lunch?
Couldn’t answer that one, partly from having a mouth full of food scoff scoff... gulp gulp partly cos well, what do you say....
I am first in the queue for seconds... and a few are looking at me now, some with that awful How brave look of Awww bless, look at her eating... awww head tilt....
C is shouting at me to get some more crumble cos it’s got pips in and she’s got to spy and she wants a rich man...
Then she asks about baggy and what effect foods have on him. I say we should be in for a fun afternoon and tell her about my uncouth new bum and Sunday best bum. Her colleague is sat next to us and she just keeps tilting her head and I want to say, you’ll get neck ache you know. She says Gosh, you are brave...
I copy the Head Tilters with their heads and laugh and C and I follow the avoiders around trying to get them to look at me (naughty I know, sorry on the naughty step for that one... )
Towards the end of the day, we move to the foyer for tea and discussions and are stood around chatting.
I am explaining something serious to a group of new people who don’t know and are serious about everything. So I am blabbing on about verification techniques and moderation and stuff and trying to be sensible for once and behind me comes a shriek from C of
“Oi Little My, I was expecting some farts from your new bum! I was most disappointed...”
... I start to laugh and turn round to say sorry he wasn’t playing this afternoon... and the lady I am talking to is looking bemused...
She’s got a colostomy bag says C. I was hoping it would be rude and it wasn’t.
Lady looks at me a bit speechless... I am still laughing .
She got bum cancer whispers C in that stage whisper that is just even more silly than speaking. I am crying now with laughter and trying not to cos the others are serious and can’t see the funny side at all and I feel a bit bad for her cos she doesn’t quite know what to say. I tell her it’s ok. I find the whole thing rather hilarious..
Head tilt.. well, its better than crying I guess and oh you are so brave (again) and Oh do you want a seat etc etc etc. Bear comes over and gives me a big hug again and asks what we are talking about.... I say well with these 2 we are talking about sensible verification and things and with these 2 we are talking about bums and farts. He starts talking about how bonkers all the Scandinavians are... cos he met some Finnish woman. (bonkers of course) and the lady gets an excuse to sidle off....
We then get onto Swedish TV and Wallander and the Killing and another couple of ladies join in and then I tell him I missed the last episode cos I was in hospital... he starts laughing at the thought of P trying to explain the last episode to me and I tell him what a birthday treat that was and we both start to laugh and of course the 2 ladies realise and I get the head tilts AGAIN!
Time for goodbyes... bear hugs and I want you to come and do some work for me, so keep alive eh? And silly giggly hugs and come down to us and we will play cancer cards for you and take you out for dinner and cuddle you up in comfy armchairs etc and oh that means you can be rude now cos no one can say anything to you.. so can you have a go at so and so for us eh? from C and then her head tilty colleague turns to me and says bye and then those wonderful words...
“ Well done you”
I smile sweetly and say thanks. Cos really I am too nice and then C and I snigger and quietly laugh about well done for what? Staying alive? Oooh well done...
So, yes I am tired but I had a lovely time being silly, catching up with old friends and also for a few hours when in the actual meeting and discussion time, I was me. The me that has a brain and can argue and discuss and has an opinion and is alive and excited and interested in the debate and the me that goes to hospitals and GC and all that wasn’t there... just for that moment I forgot.
And that has got to be worth a few spoons in my book.
Tomorrow is a day of rest, even for a heathen like me...
Little My. Xxx
Ps although it is relatively short and maybe St Bernard Bernard isn’t needed, the bar is open for drinks cos you lot deserve them for putting up with me xxxx
