Gettin used to the New Normal (or not)

7 minute read time.

Finally got internet so can get back on here and chat (oh no, too many words I hear you say) Ha ha I have got a week's worth....!

I love my new house. It is dirty and needs new everything but I love it. What I love best of all is that things work.... those of you that have been reading these tomes all along know that often in Little My's world Mr Sod Law likes to visit and stuff goes wrong at annoying times... well.. without wanting to tempt fate, recently things seem to be going very smoothly so far....

The phone came on when they said it would. Broadband a day early. Only me and a bowl got broken in the move (last time it was half the house!) and stuff works.

We have a toilet that flushes...and whatever is in there goes down it (apparently, I wouldn't know of course having baggy to play with) The taps spew forth hot water straight away.... the house is warm and has central heating. There are not mice and moths and damp patches and mould on the walls.

At this point some of you might be thinking that I used to live in Basra or somewhere..and is Wales that backwards... .not quite...  just a ramshackled house in the middle of nowhere that we didn't have the money to fix and it had stuff that didn't work and no mains stuff etc. Our old loo took 2 hours to fill after you flushed it, and in the meantime buckets needed to be employed and even if it did flush, buckets needed to be employed to actually flush in the way it is meant to work and as we had no water pressure, it would take quite a long time to fill the bucket... remembering I was a right little sh*tter in those days too pre-baggy and you can see why I spent half my life in the bathroom and seem to be obsessed with toilets. Also we had a cesspit that meant we then had to pay someone (a nice man called Phil as it happens) to come up and suck up all that water etc and take it away...

So, Little My is  marvelling at the water gushing out of the taps and the loo that flushes and the lack of mould and moths etc and a roof that doesn't leak... I do wonder if the bloke that bought our house is now sitting there thinking what did I do that for?

We are within walking distance of shops and pubs and stuff and that is so exciting! And the walk is beautiful along the river (only 10 mins for me, 5 mins for a human who can walk like a human) We don't have a cooker yet (tomorrow's fun day out to the scary hated cooker shop aka Curry's) so am living off takeaways that I walk to get!!! Yum. Haven't lost my junk food cravings yet so happy to have the excuse to eat rubbish for a week. ha ha .

I am so easily pleased.

Wondered if walking 5 mins to the kebab shop and back counts as exercise in Mac's book?

Actually that is a tricky one. Exercise say Macland. Will stop Hefty coming back. Do weight lifting bone density type exercises says GC to stop osteoporosis developing...

I lift a box and I spill my guts literally rather than metaphorically which is not good and now stoma nurse threatens me with nasty things and hospital beds etc if I lift more than a nug of coffee (I was expecting her to say and only half a mug!) so how do I exercise? Is it a choice? busting your guts or squashy bones? hmmm. Hence walking to the shops- at least I seem to be able to still walk, even if I do have to sit on a few of my new neighbour's walls to get my breath back and sometimes P comes with me for a walk and we haven't done that since M was a baby and that feels good. this is an old normal I am glad to see return... cancer made us find eachother again and for that, I am grateful.

I am loving the semblance of normalilty at work though not being able to carry my huge school bag or computer around reminds me constantly how un normal I am. trouble is, it is like you get a taste of it and it makes you want more and to be able to do more. Do you know what I mean?

melancholic alert..... grab a drink while you are at it- I would!

When your bum is burned off and you can't sit down and live in a morphine haze you are happy to be alive and look at clouds. When you can sit and walk etc and are allowed to go back out into te world and do a ittle bit of work, it starts to feel normal and you remember why you liked your life and its crazy annoying normal stuff and you want to do it. But you can't cos you get too tired and you can't lift anything and that is frustrating... very frustrating for a Little My who was brought up to fend for herself and do everything and be strong and tough and if a boy can lift it, then so can you etc... and of course not everyone knows about my lingering side effects and only a few know about me doing my impersonation of a sausage factory cos its not something you shout out in the staffroom is it? Hey guess what? my intestines popped out and I can't lift stuff... so at the end of the meeting, I stood up and looked forlornly at my chair hoping someone who knew would come over and pick it up for me but they didn't see and I had to ask the lady sitting next to me who has a bad back and I normally carry stuff for her... and it wrankles.

That turned into a bit of a moan and I didn't mean it to... just a bit frustrated cos we have got a new house that needs painting and boxes to unpack and I'm itching to do it all and can't and there is a conference i wanted to go to next week and can't and we did tug of war at school yesterday for our Harvest festival thing and my class wanted me to help them (cos I am strong) and I had to say no even though  GC says he can't see Hefty but its not that simple is it..... I guess this is the new normal I was waiting to see. Ho hum.

My bum hurts. Did we want to know that you say? Probably not. Well, only cos I can see it starting again... it hurts like it did when Hefty was up there. I am going to GC in 2 weeks to play hunt the rolo as usual and there is that little voice in the back of your head that is already starting with... what if it hurts cos Hefty is coming back... and then I think he can't come back so quick, but then again, GC wouldn't want to check in a month if there was no point would he? And as I said in warped, I am not progressing onto the new Rolo biscuits whatever Sunny suggests.

So new normal... not doing stuff and I guess I will have to get used to still worrying a bit about what GC will find. But my other new normal is coooooooooool! I have a toilet that flushes and hot water and the best bit is this was a 'downsizing' activity to pay off debts and have some money left over etc so I bought the nice bracelet I have been drooling over for ages and I am going to treat myself to the charms/bead things as celebrations for aniversaries of no Hefty and if he comes back then I will get one as a comiseration present (win- win ha ha like it?) and I got the most lovely shiny red coffee machine that looks retro and froths milk etc and a new toaster and we can go out and get nice duvet covers instead of the value range sod the pattern, is it cheap type. I know it might sound a bit shallow but it is nice to be able to get things that work and are beautiful and I do agree with whatsisface who said about surrounding yourself with things that are useful and/or beautiful...

Off to carefully unpack boxes one tiny thing at a time and to paint walls with the tiny brush and with my big hold it all in pants on... ok? no leg slaps???

Love to you all and housewarming drinks and snacks tonight.,,

Big hug

Little My xxx

now what do I call this one? Oh you will know cos I will have done it by the time you read it...

 

 

 

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    hey Tiggs, great to hear from you... half cold coffee? With my new groovy machine? I don't think so!

    Tim will cross things for you for tomorrow (intestines doing it already- they are a bit keen!) and will miss you from here now I've got back...

    to all of you, I know my bum ache is just that... healing etc bum ache. I just forgot that I still have to go and see GC every month to check it hasn't come back which makes you think it might which makes you think... ha ha you know! Thought i had got away from that one.... never mind. Of course I will deal with it like I did last time (or possibly better) but now I've had a taste of the fun stuff again I will be an exceedingly cross Little My if it does. But it won't :o)

    Ooooh Ems, a normal bum certificate- can I have it framed on the wall? ha ha and yes, the new wife does have ideas and he does think it is quaint (or he did when our furniture and billion books were hiding the moths and the mould ) snigger.... I saw your pm but couldn't reply cos of no internet. I will do soon and thanks! Might not be for months and months though.... Tim is trail blazing that one for me first, though his hospital has free wifi, not sure Neville Hall even know what wifi is....

    Hilary, I am hoping that the Rolos will become an occasional past time with GC rather than lifestyle, cos as gorgeous as he is, i would be quite happy to fondly remember his shiny face rather than go and see him every month. Here's hoping! It was William Morris. I forgot (chemo brain) and then remembered but then thought is was Ruskin and then thought oh I'm not sure anymore and didn't want to get it wrong and have you lot saying Ruskin who? surely it was Morris... and the rest of you saying Rusks? mmmm they are like biscuits.... so thanks for helping me remember. Happy to repay the favour now you are joining us in chemo brain land..... what a wonderful foogy place it is! Go to the coop in your nightie- I dare you! snigger and I won't pray for you cos I don't... Stinker does that for me but sunny will sacrifice a goat for you if you get stuck and I am good at crossing things. so ym fniegrs rae corssde fro yuo... that you get home safely.

    Stinker, I am not scared now, just thinking i will be right peed off... and am right peed off I can't do stuff but hey ho... gives me time to chat to you lot.... My sitting room is now painted (wasn't me gov, it was the paint fairies wot done it honest) and only got the new carpet, new fireplace, picture rails to do and then it will need repainting etc again ha ha. At least P is more girly than me in the love of cushions and comfy so we are going shopping soon for new cushions and more squidgy things to put on the squidgy sofas...

    Big higs oh did it again, bug hugs

    (sorry that reply was longer than most people's blogs and I haven't told you about the cats or anything yet... eeeek so much to say....

    Little My xxxxxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Little My good to have you back. 

    You could be a trolley dolly. I carry all my work/school stuff in a fancy flight attendants case - i go into school and say 'Peanuts anyone, something from the trolley?'

    You can get some really funky ones too - just don't over fill it!

    Enjoy your new home - surround yourself with pretty things it makes you feel good that's what i do even though hubby calls it tat I say it is good taste xx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    From one former weightlifter to another, I sympathise. Having done a lot of weight training in the past, I have always been very strong so I get really pi**ed off now that I can't do that lifting stuff any more. My arms and shoulders are so weak and painful (I still don't understand why lung cancer makes your arms so sore), that I can't lift much at all, and as I still look very substantial, people tend to look at me as if I'm being lazy!

    I'm so glad you now live somewhere more confortable. Your old place sounds like my current place. I can't afford to do anything with it and so far this year I've has to sort out low water pressure (which stopped my washing machine working), roof leaks in 3 rooms, peeling celiing as an after-effect, leaking windows, damp patch in bathroom and sitting room. I could go on, and on, and on... However, I'm hoping to find somewhere a bit more civilised too, hopefully while I am still capable of coping with a move! After a rather hectic day today, the stairs to the flat almost killed me and all I've done since I got home is collapse in a chair, with an ocassional hop to the kitchen to take on board some water. Hang on, hop sounded energetic, I should have said, trudge.

    Hope you have a good, and very relaxing weekend.

    Love you, Ann x

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Daisybun, trolley dolly ha ha ha... like that... I did think about getting a tartan granny shopping trolley....

    Sunny... I answered this bit on warped so your warped answer comes here... blimey you do need a sit down after that and no more hopping!!! Ohhang on the hopping bit was here... oh I give up. Also, you need to tell me your birthday pressie size...

    Good night and hope you have a relaxing weekend. I have got to go and buy a cooker tomorrow and then unpack and finish painting the bedroom so not a lot of relaxing going on I guess (shh don't tell the others cos they will shout at me) You being a weight lifter will understand.. did you really lift weights? I used to be a lumberjack in a previous existence but never been to a gym.

    Love you

    Little My xxxx 

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Not a weight-lifter, just weight-training! Subtle difference, no bulging biceps (well, not too much anyway!). Strengthens and conditions without you having a body like the incredible hulk! I once worked for a wholesale chemist in the Vet dept. Spent a lot of time shifting pallets of goods and lifting 5 gallon drums of sheep dip and formaldehyde. Certainly toughened me up but as we now know both of those are very dangerous, and the bloody things were always leaking. Who should I sue?

    Lumberjack sounds good. Did you have a big chopper? Or any kind of bike? Did you wear the compulsory checked shirt?

    Please be careful and let P lift the cooker and take the rest of the weekend off! Rome wasn't built in a day...

    Love you! Ann x