Hello! Oh dear... I just had a look and I have not written a blog for ages and ages and aaaages...
Hurrah! say you lot, we got time to catch our breath and rest our eyes...
Anyway, this one won't be long... haha I hear you say... heard that one before!
Oh ok, better send Bernard St Bernard out with the brandy just in case...
I am currently sat on a hotel bed in Torquay with my son :) I came down to get him to take him home tomorrow so we can go away on Sunday. The room is HUGE! Free wifi, loads of biscuits, crap on the telly… what more do you want eh? If anyone wants to nip down and join us, there is plenty of room and I raided the complimentary tea tray and asked for a top up so got lots of biscuits going spare... and the cupboard is big enough for at least 2 to sleep in.. J
On Sunday I am taking a class away for a week to an eco centre to stay in yurts and all that sort of outdoorsy stuff and Max is coming with me to look after one of the kids with 'difficulties' or 'don't leave with the scissors' boy. Hence coming to get him.
It has been a bit of a funny old time since I last wrote. Some days I almost forget about the cancer and life seems almost normal but it’s sort of always there like ems says... 'white noise' and in my case white noise is about right cos my tinnitus that I have been left with is worst when I wake up and I think oh what's that noise in my head... oh yeah... cancer.... and you can't forget for long.
Max has been getting anxious and stressed about things and P has been in one of his depressed states, but P seems to be getting out of it now and at least I have some time with Max to help sort him out a bit and what he might want to do in life. He is a bit of an eccentric and feels he doesn't fit in and damn good job I think but he hasn't found his niche yet so need to help him find it somehow.
I just deleted a whole pile of this blog cos it was gloomy and introspective and not needed. Try again…
I joined a health club… hahaaa I have turned into a gym bunny hahaaaa.. I wanted to get fit before my operation as best I could and it does help with my stamina doing some swimming but I braved the gym too. I made the bloke laugh cos there was a sheet you had to fill in about your health and there was a thing about headaches and I questioned whether to say yes or no and he said oh put no, and I said don’t worry I am going to scare the pants off you with the rest of this form anyway… a headache is the least of your worries! :D I told him I had the stamina of an 80 year old and he laughed and said I am sure you don’t and I laughed and said Oh yes I do…Guess who was right? He was great though cos he didn’t tilt his head at all and set me a target to be able to get up out of a chair without using my arms and walking for 5 mins and cycling for 5 mins on level 1. I look really funny with the gym bunnies running around and there is me gasping for breath walking. It makes me giggle… (not hard that one, though) And the pool is adults only and quiet and you can have a sauna afterwards... Nice :)
I really came on to say don't worry if you don't hear much from me for the next week as I will be 'down on the farm' in Devon and no electricity,, never mind wifi haha. There is an office computer and I might be able to sneak on there and maybe my shiny new iphone will get a signal and can say hi on that but not sure yet... I will be eating lentils and turnips and up to my knees in mud and sleeping in a yurt but I do love it down there and I get a week with Max too hoorah!!
Shame I've got to take 26 teenagers with me.... but lots of good friends there and I'm going to see my mates, some of who I have not seen in a year... Last time I was there with a class, I had just been told I had cancer and it was that week away from it all cos I knew it was the calm before the storm of consultants and plans and treatment and all that... and it will be so lovely to see some of them that last I saw them, I didn't know if I would see them again... hahaaa Imagine how big a hug some of us are going to get on Sunday!!!
This time, it is also the calm before the storm of the next round of appointments when I get back and my operation. I have to admit I am getting a little nervous. I am also getting a little nervousof the aftermath of it about my check up with GC cos it will have been 3 months.
Here is my bizarre logic. I didn't get so nervous before as they have been monthly check ups and I kept thinking a month was not long enough for anything to grow big enough to feel, so after one ok check up, I guessed the next one would be ok.. (skewed logic I know, but it worked for me) now it will have been 3 months when i go on the 9th... that could be long enough for something to have grown and if it has then I won't get my operation and I hate the thought that I will be all geared up for it and then it not happen as much as the thought of the cancer back. Once again, skewed I know...
I am going to stop now cos all I wanted to say was bye and have a good week and I’ll be in touch when I get back and there has got to be some funny stories from having my bum stretched and bye to baggy eh? So, silly service resumed soon and I will regale you with silly stories from the ward….and ems will probably be in the same time as me (sods law she goes to different hospital just as I go to hers -good luck ems) and Tim might over lap too so we can compare dinners and wards and stuff ..though ems will have her own room I am sure as she is queen of the side wards- honestly the lengths some people will go to, to get their own room!!! I’ll be slumming it on the 4 bedder with the weirdos as usual. I do, however get a yurt to myself next week hahaaaa.
In the meantime…
You lot must promise to take care of yourselves for the next week and nothing bad is to happen at all ok? and look after eachother and all that while I am away cos I don't want to be worrying about you all.... I am going to be playing eco warrior in the woods :)
Complimentary tea/coffee and biscuits from the tray tonight or grab Bernard if you want something stronger and see you all soon.
Hugs galore to you all
Little My xxx
Ps if you want to see where I am going… google Embercombe
