Its difficult to find something amusing in my present situation but I have a chap who helps me out with the jobs I can no longer manage, he is the equivalent of the cowboy who can talk to the Apache, unlike his peacekeeping Cavalry friend .
You know the thing I mean?, he walks up to White cloud or the warring Geronimo and in perfect Indian speak , a bit like French, he chats away until all parties get the message and Geronimo agrees to stop cutting up the Pony Express horses and eating em, well Dave could be his apprentice.
Today on my return from hospital and feeling a bit rough, with my first introduction to Chemo, , he sat me on my garden bench near the waterfall and told me “not to worry drugs can have this effect, he takes some and he knows”.
Apparently the thing I should be wary off is that these drugs can make me Paranormal. Now I defy anyone to be annoyed by a drug making one paranormal. After all this must be like Superman or Spiderman .my hero’s. However as this informative conversation progressed to the point where I was told that in fact people were not been nasty about me behind my back “,no it’s the drugs Pete”.
I realized that to be Paranormal wasn’t my destiny, but Paranoia was a distinct possibility, and coming from a man who has just purchased a 42inch platinum screen television. It must be so.
“ Of course been a nymphomaniac is a bit of a nuisance but one has to live with these things, it’s an illness Pete and none of your doing”. Well there’s a relief then.
Apparently there is a woman in his street who: according to his spouse; has the same problem, she’s been reported to the warden who could stop it if he wanted, but credit where its due, he does go along to the house and spends some time telling her off about all these men going along the cul de sac.
I did point out that I don’t have dozens of women calling to the bungalow, but was told in no uncertain terms “ it’s different in men.”
So another set back. I suppose Lymphoma isn’t quite in his mind so Nymphomania will have to do.
I’m not sure I ‘ll get used to him informing my friends I have serious Nymphomania, and I am getting some quizzical looks as they go past .Especially the ladies. can you imagine the conversations going between them
“Keep clear of Pete ,he’s a serious nymphomaniac” ,and it might make all his hair fall out”
Not much hope for a bald nymphomaniac I wouldn’t think.
But perhaps that the effects of the drugs making me Paranormal.
The Starrfish
