In 2013, Paul's PSA level began to rise. He began to feel unwell too with weakness, nausea, vomiting and lack of appetite. He lost a lot of weight in a very short period of time.
In the spring of 2014, CT and bone scan revealed that the cancer had spread to bones and lymph nodes. Looking back on it now, I cannot understand why the scans were performed as late as spring of 2014; I mean, the PSA had been going up and…
Before I continue telling our story, I want to share a thought I am really passionate about: Scans for patients with any form of advanced cancer have to be performed every six months. It is not right to only perform scans when the patient has developed symptoms or when specific tumor markers have gone beyond the normal range. Many tumors would be discovered a lot sooner, and in many cases they would be much more treatable…
Today I would like to share some thoughts I had back on the evening of Paul's death when I was allowed to return to the room where the nurses had washed Paul, had put a white sheet over him, had put a small bunch of flowers between his hands that were now folded over his chest and had lit a vanilla scented candle on the table beside his bed.
The room felt so peaceful.
This was the room in which, less than one hour…
We Remember Them (by Rabbi Sylvan Kamens and Rabbi Jack Riemer)
At the rising of the sun and at its going down
We remember them.
At the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter
We remember them.
At the opening of the buds and in the rebirth of spring
We remember them.
At the blueness of the skies and in the warmth of summer
We remember them.
At the rustling of the leaves and in the beauty of autumn
We remember…
"You see," the oncologist said calmly, "what has happened here is that your cancer has spread into the liver."
I can still remember the shocked silence in the room. Even though we had been expecting to hear this, when we actually heard it, we felt really shocked.
I don't know what Paul was thinking, but I know that I thought: Once cancer has metastasised to the liver it is really bad.
The oncologist…
