scattering ashes again: different ashes

Hello Minima your so right things all seem to happen at once just when your trying to sort one thing out the great bird of fate throws something else your way.Just wish that bird would buzz off or someone would shoot it at times.As I said previously your mum will do whatever she wants but I think FIL held a special place so I hope whatever is decided in relation to his ashes is something that he would want and that you all feel an appropriate way of saying goodbye.Much love and hugs Cruton xxx

Hello, Cruton.

Yes, I think the family will rally for a final farewell to FIL. He was a lovely, lovely old man. Gentle nad kind and friendly and SO unlike my parents it's not true!!!
FIL was a 'normal' dad to his 3 offspring, and a 'normal' grandfather and greatgrandfather, as in, not normal at all, but kind and loving and cheerful. I was always touched when J and I would visit him and he would be so obviously delighted to see us. He thought the sun shone out of J (mostly because it does) but he was J's hero and I have some trepidation for J when the ashes event takes place. J is a true Bloke: doesn't really show emotions, just likes to 'get on with things' and carry on starching his upper lip. Since his dad died in June, he's always said he was 'fine' and 'ok'. Maybe he is! His dad was 97, after all, and we kind of lost him gradually as he got frailer and frailer and quieter and quieter.

The comparison between J's upbringing and mine is quite pronounced. They're all supportive of each other and they all get on well. I've never encountered a family like them.

But the more time I spend on this site, the more I realise the world IS actually full of warm, loving people and I've somehow missed meeting most of them!

Big hugs to you, and thank you for commenting x x x

ooh just seen this. Sorry I missed it. Not got anyhting to add to the above esp Cruton, so just

Sending you a big big hug xxx

hello minima, how some of our lives seem to differ from others? are they better are thay worse? depends what goes on behind closed doors i guess, we all tend, i think, to put on a face for the "outside world".

sorry you are going thru the mill at the mo, me too a bit, bri is good im pleased to say, but my neighbour/friend who i sort of keep an eye on cos she has some mental health issues, she has no children, n a fairly "distant" husband, so im really close to her, well shes been in hospital for 5 days, had mri scan and has bone mets, lower spine mainly, knocked me for six a bit cos i dont think she realises the severity of diagnosis,

anyway this is about you, not me, thinking of you, sending you strength, and my love     kaitie xxx

Hi - thank you for your message. I am sorry you lost your husband, is it? The reason I'm on this is I wanted to know if it is legal to spread ashes of a human being like that? I'm from Canada and we can't do that here. People do it still, but illegally.

I want to thank you for a laugh when I read about you finishing to spread the ashes in the dark.

I lost my husband to pancreatic cancer in June of last year. I am still struggling. Don't know if I'll ever get over this.

You certainly had a lot of death in the family. I hope you are coping. I'll say a prayer for you.

Wilela