Today is the first day I've seen mum quite low in mood. She decided not to go out with Nuala and I and, therefore, didn't put on her wig. The reason for her low mood is definitely her hair coming out. She asked me tonight to run my hand through her hair and see how much came away. She then said 'it would break your heart!' and she's right it would. I've watched her today and she has been constantly running her fingers through her hair and then looking at the hair in her hand. Yet again I find myself powerless to do anything. I suggested that maybe she gets it cut really short or that she even may want to shave it off. She said the thought made her feel sick. Shouldn't have suggested it but was trying to explain that many people on here have said that that's what they had done and had felt ok once it had all gone. I'm gutted for her and am concerned that after having a few good days earlier in the week she is now quite depressed.
I'm off to work in the morning and Nuala is heading back to London so she'll be on her own for most of the day and I know that her hair will be constantly in her thoughts as there will be no distractions. There is a temptation to stay at home but I can't stop her hair falling out so would be of little use. I also need to take time off to take her for her appointments and chemo so need to be in work whenever possible. I was going to say I know that we're on a rollercoaster but I love rollercoasters and I most certainly am not loving this!!
Anyway enough moaning for tonight, maybe tomorrow will be a good day? I pray that it is.
