well this is just a bit of a mumble to myself i guess....
everyone keeps saying... when are you going back to work? well... i answer, when i feel ready.... some weeks i dont have the time to even think about work....
today ive been the dentist... 1st time in 2 years, as ive had no worries about my teeth, and well, because i had braces, and because i hated these braces, when i had them off, i never went back again....
same with hospitals, i hate hospitals, so if i dont have to go, i wont go... i guess its my way of taking control... but anyways back to the dentist....
she was there as they do, left (321 123 whichever way they say it), no four left no gap, no four right no gap top and bottom... and then, hmmm a filling will be needed... well... i need 4 fillings.... eeeeeekkkk... and thats because my wisdom teeth have been digging in to the back teeth top and bottom.... so ive got to go back two more times.... ive had an xray on my wisdom teeth to. because they say they are concerned about them, so they may need coming out.... ohhh great joy!! that means il have to go back again or maybe even hospital if they need coming out... booooo!!!!! so... thats ANOTHER thing!!! =( suppose its my own fault really for not going to the dentist in a long time, but then, when u get scared and fed up, you dont go do ya. and then with treatment starting last november, and building back up my immune system ive not been able to go...
well tomorrow is THE big day for me... and im very scared and nervous for it, im going to see the pyschologist... dont ask me why im so scared because i havent got a clue... i guess its the feeling of getting judged by somebody that doesnt know your life, or whats been happening...... but i really hope it helps me, as im fed up of being fed up, and fed up of everything!! so.... fingers crossed it will help me.....
then im off out partying down the town ohhh and saturday, for a hen night... should be good to take my mind off it all...
then monday.... heres a biggy... im having my photos taken for the local newspaper to give my story, to help promote macmillan, and this site, and to help promote the coffee morning...
then the 27-29th il be going down to west sussex for jens memorial day...
then, i have a wedding to go to on the 4th september, and two wedding parties that night... why does everyone decide to get married the same day???
then the 5th september im going to alton towers with a load of friends, so i had better not drink to much the saturday night!! or i wont be a pretty sight on the rides.. haha...
then the 19th im going to a family meal... that should be good....
the 23rd i have an appointment with the heamotologist just for a check up... bet he will ask why im not back at work yet......
then the 24th, is the macmillan coffee morning, and im going to be a special guest for one near us... whooop whooop...
25th september i have a friends 21st party to go to....
then... i had my appointment come through to see the chest specialist about the lung damage from chemo.. thats the 7th of october.. a bit of a way to go... but still, another day booked up in my busy diary of medical stuff... lol!!!!
thennnn in november on the 4th i will be going to see, disney on ice :D
and in all that time, it will be the year mark for being diagnosed with hodgkins lymphoma... i havent work since the 14th of september 2009... and i was diagnosed properly on the 22nd of october.....
isnt it crazy how time flies? and how things soon come round... i mean, in 4 months time, it will be christmas again... and in 4 months time, i will be celebrating my 21st birthday.... and when i think about it, i might not have made it to my 21st birthday.... but i did, cuz cancer wasnt gunna kick my ass!!!
phewwwwwwwwwww think il take a breath now!! hahaha.... back to the point....
so when someone says... when are you going back to work.... at the minute.... im having fun =)
