being a hairdresser, it is my job to do my sisters and mums hairs, which is done after salon hours (dont want to scare the customers....lol), we get together every tuesday night anyway... so tuesday evening it is, every third week, i seem to remember managing to keep it up with my last chemo (8 fec 100 finished 18 months ago) im on my second lot of taxotere now, done it a week ago today, so as a back up i arranged for hayley, my junior stylist to help out "just incase", to be honest i just wanted her there to see what everyone has done so if she is needed at a later date to step in she`ll be ok, you see i have 4 sisters , my mum and a friend who all have a tint and cut and blow dry, which being speedy gonzales, i can usually do in 2- 2 1/2 hours... mere mortals usually 1 to 1 1/2 hours per person, hayley... a bit longer....
so we all arrive at the salon, i set hayley off on joans hair while i put beatrices tint on... then cut mums (no tint today), frances said she would last till next time, just a fringe trim,and my friend patience, tint and highlights, so me and hayley do it together, the chips arrive so we stop for a break while all the tints take... all pretty normal stuff eh?
soooooooo i decided not just to do fran`s fringe but full cut and straighten.....mmmmm feeling a wee bit flushed..... silly girl... havent even done anything.... is it my picc line??.....hayley in the mean time is rinsing... so ok... i`ll cut and hayley can blow dry, so then all my family are going...ARE U OK??? what? course i am... blooming hell only had a wee flush... then i look in the mirror.... does any one remember aunt sally??? well she had big round rosey cheeks... and thats what i looked like! where did that come from?....ok so i needed a wee sit down...
by this time almost everyone was done so i tried to avoid the pitiful glares... and the ... your overdoing it ... let hayley finish.... sit down...... very hard when you are surrounded by 6 ft mirrors i can tell you, ha ha.... but the upshot is
right your not driving home alone... yes i bloody am!.... every one of them wants to stay with me tonight.... i really do love them all and i know i am so lucky to have such a caring family, and yes maybe i should be a better "sick person"... but i cant just give up the life i love... i refuse to give in to this crap called cancer... i cant "take it easy"... but one little wobble doesnt mean i need a babysitter... i hate being babied, i hate being the sick one, when i dont feel well i want to be alone, am i weird? i feel fine now..... am i too hard on them?
ok thanks guys, for letting me rant, got it off my chest...
we`re doing the race for life on sunday, me and my sisters, yes i`ll be well fit for it, wish us luck,
onwards and upwards
COURAGE ... IS WHEN YOUR SCARED TO DEATH...... BUT YOU SADDLE UP ANYWAY
liz xx
