My mum had her PET scan on Monday and the lung cancer nurse rang yesterday to say that it's 'inoperable', basically explaining that it's attached to 'central nodules' (in other words, they can't remove the whole thing). They said she can have chemo, but to be honest she is quite anti-chemo as she doesn't want to be made ill when the prognosis is so poor anyway.
Any advice - for or against - would be really welcome. I am happy to go with what my mum wants, but I need to know whether she could even withstand chemo before we totally rule it out. She is deteriorating daily, and continues to lose weight rapidly. I'm in that 'unreal' place - you know the one where it happens to everyone else and your heart goes out to them, and suddenly it's happening to your mum....?
Swinging between numb and heartbroken, coping and falling apart. So lucky to have a wonderfully supportive husband and work colleagues who have been amazing.
Your experiences please...
H x
FormerMember
You are blessed Hannah to have a mom who is setting it up so you can handle it better. I have always said that children will handle a crisis as well as you do (the parent). Sounds like your Mom is doing just that and very honestly. I can see why you will miss her, she sounds wonderful! Hang in and truly enjoy her. Stay in touch. When you are having a rough day we are here!
Thank you for your lovely message - I read it last night just before I went to sleep and I remember the tears on both cheeks. My mum and I had our first talk about funeral arrangements on Thursday night, she started saying what she wanted and I listened and nodded. I was in 'angry' mode a little bit and I told her that as I had cared for her for the last 7 years, I won't be told what to do by anyone else who hasn't been around and that I will make the arrangements. Felt a bit stupid in the morning though - as if I'm not going to need help!!! I apologised for my ranting and raving and my mum said 'That's what mums are here for - to listen to the ranting and raving and let you get it off your chest.' Like she needs me swearing my head off - I DON'T THINK!!!
I will miss so many things about her, I wouldn't know where to start, but I am going to make the most of this special time and if that means telling other people to 'go home' or 'come on a different day' then that's what will happen. Not being selfish, but I don't want to regret things later on.
