Afternoon blog buddies,
What have I been up to? Well.... Day 4 in bed and still no sight of land? or normality maybe?
I finished my four week chemo-radiation course on Monday. Dr Oncologist warned me about the nasty side effects, the diarrhoea, the loss of hair locally, making me infertile and giving me the early menopause and maybe some skin discomfort. I was not prepared for the radiation burns to my most delicate 'areas'. I was assured that radiotherapy would be much easier to undergo than chemotherapy. Now that I am out the other side I think I would disagree, it has just been different, still as tiring and upsetting and physically wearing. Having spoken to others who have undergone the same treatment I believe I may be a tad unlucky with getting the side effects, others appear to have not been so bad.
I haven't worn clothes for most of this week because it is just too sore neither have I walked very far or actually done very much at all. I have to admit to having cried on more than one occasion as I am feeling quite miserable. I have a busy time now with my university course and should be concentrating on that, I have tried and I have spent some time carefully putting together some activities and doing some general studying. But overall my concentration is naff, I cannot focus for long neither can I really think straight.
I am also the proud owner of about six different tubes of cream to try and alleviate the worst of the symptoms from the burns and I am disappointed that I have had to up my morphine intake.
However, this is only for a temporary period, the skin will heal as will my body, gradually and slowly over the coming months but it will get better. With my returning general health my mental health will undoubtedly improve and my general 'funk' will dissipate once more. All these periods are just that, periods, they ultimately end and you move into a new one. I remind myself daily that I am already lucky, others with stage 4 cancer are not so lucky to be moaning about radiation burns because it is too late to have it. So I count my blessings, might not sound like it but I do.
Christmas is coming, the house sale is finally moving along and I have completed a gruelling six months of intensive cancer treatment. So ner cancer.
What next? I am now in limbo, no treatment. In six weeks roughly I will have a scan to see how effective the radiotherapy has been and then I guess I will be left alone for a period of watchful waiting. That is scary but it also allows us to hopefully regain some normal time together as a family.
Enjoy spending time with your family and friends over the coming weeks, I know I intend to. Oh...and don't be afraid to moan....it is good for the soul. Take it from a professional moaner....
