When I started my first blog on here it was the 14th July this year and I was just two weeks past a surprise diagnosis of bladder cancer. Reading my first blog again this morning I can see how far I have come, seen what a trauma of life changing appointments, tests and surgery it has been.
And so I woke up on Tuesday morning, 20th October 2009 certainly a different person than I did in June this year. Now that is less than four months ago but it feels like I have had this cancer for a lot longer than that. Before Cancer (BC) was a very long time ago. A time when life was good but as ordinary as most people's life is.
This cancer has changed me and, dare I admit it, made me a better person. In that I mean better for me, better for family and friends, better for the old friends who have stuck with me, better for the new friends I have made. I certainly care more about me and my loved ones than I used too. Not that I didn't care for them before but I think, like we all do, I took them for granted.
I can honestly say that I like the current me. And any one that doesn't can simply bog off! Must admit I do not tread on many eggshells round people nowadays!
And so here I was on a Tuesday with a simple day ahead of me. A little bit of work on the computer, a few phone calls and then be ready for the delivery from the veggie delivery man who always comes at 11.15 am, give or take 5 mins, every tuesday morning. A brief rest after sorting it out and stacking the dishwasher and it was already afternoon.
Tuesday afternoon was special. I breezed through the afternoon doing a bit of work with a nice break mid way for a quiet sit down and rest the eyes and then back to do a few final work bits before "packing up work" at 5 pm sharp. Trying to get into the habit for when I go back full time. When it is time to stop work and go home I will stop work and go home. :-)
I know how lucky I am. At the moment I am nearly 9 weeks post surgery and the early signs have been much better than they could have been. I know that I have another CT scan in 12 days time which I'm keeping my fingers crossed for. But I am living my life and the cancer is not in control of it at the moment. That time might come, in six months, a year, 5 years or never, time will tell.
I also know how happy I am most of the time. When I feel good I feel great and get a bigger buzz from the fact that I know I will beat this horrible thing. I have my pooh moments like we all do but then again I had them BC but about different things so what's the difference??
Tuesday was a day I controlled so it was a good day. I plan on having a good day again on Wednesday and then everyday until I reach my 100th birthday when I will host a rather large party.
Happy Wednesday everyone.
Keep smiling ;-)
Andrew xxx
