Will the sad news never end!!!!!!!!!

2 minute read time.

Its been nearly a month since I have updated you on our daily "normal" life..........

Things are still good with Dave with regards to his check-ups, no signs of its return but still on 3 monthly appointments. He was hoping it would be 6 monthly now as we are nearly 3yrs post op but I'm happy with early ones. He is still battling with his depression and I have found a way to cope with him better so not many low days for me now...yeah!

Our Brother-in-law did return to hospital for his biopsy on his lung but the results were inconclusive, he then had a PET scan.........the lung is secondery.

Dave and I had been talking about the "what if's" with regards to BIL and how best we can help as they live about an hours drive away in a village that gets cut off with snow and heavy rain (The little stream bursts its banks and then your up to your hips in water).

I decided to go down to them on the day of his results....I made sure they had alot of time on their own first to take in the sad news.

In all of the 21yrs I have known Daves sister I have never seen her cry, she does but always in private. 

BIL was in the field feeding the horses when I arrived, I called out to him and asked him if he wanted a coffee.........with a smile he replied "yes mate, that will be lovely"

When I entered their home SIL was standing at the sink, a big smile but such sad eyes. The only words she could muster were "its not good", I gave her a big hug and she just broke down in my arms........then moaned at me and said...."your right, you cant beat a real hug (have sent loads of virtual ones) but you made me bloody cry and I was trying so hard to be strong".

I stayed the night with them.. we had serious talks..we laughed out loud..we had cuddles..we got serious again and laughed alot more.

They are mad as hatters just like me, thats why we get on so well... She calls me witchy pooh as I always ring or turn up when she is low or in need of a chat or just that hug....she is strong, funny and very loving and my heart hurts for them, for the pain they are experiencing now.

He even has it in his bum cheek....its in his bones right side, shoulder left side....he said he lit up like a christmas tree. They told him he is terminal but may be able to give some form of treatment to prolong his life by a few months!!

Dave always said when he was diagnosed that he had a "condition" and that I couldn't moan at him........BIL told us that he was a "terminater" and should be let off making cups of tea....the humour is present and I'm sure it will remain. The humour has baffled his son, he cant believe that they are joking and acting as normal....he will understand as time goes on I'm sure.

So I'm a bit tied up right now with family, but I think of you all, every day, and hope all is going well with you.

((((((((((((((((XXXXXXXXXXXXX)))))))))))))))))))

 

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Thinking of you too, mumsy... so sorry to hear of another one in the family but glad they have you to be there for them too with your caring and humour and love.

    Make sure you look after yourself too eh?

    Biggest hug to you and wish it could be a real one and not a virtual one cos you deserve it

    Little My xxxxxx ((((((((((((((((((((((((((mumsy shaz)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Shaz

    Glad that you're finding a way to deal with Dave's depression. Its so hard finding the balance and managing to keep your own sanity. He does at least seem to acknowledge that there are other people that need your support, which has got to be a good thing.

    BIL has already got the hang of using his cancer cards. Haha! You'll have to tip him off about others he could use. Your nephew is in denial at the moment, but will find his way eventually. We all deal with upsets in life in different ways.

    Take care of yourselves

    xxxxxxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Shaz

    Poor B-i-L. He is quite right, he's exempt from tea-making, cooking, mowing the lawn, making the bed, and putting the loo seat down. This is only right and just (though rough on S-i-L). On reflection, S-i-L is already having a rotten time, so maybe we'll cancel those exemptions.

    Life does only seem to get suckier, doesn't it? I suppose we just have to make the best of it.

    Lots of hugs,

    Hilary

    xxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Shaz,So glad Dave is ok,sorry about B.I.LAW if it helps Petes prognosis was 6months and with treatment my baby fought for 6years so keep positive ,thinking of u all .Hugs Chris.xxxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi shaz,

    Good news and glad Dave's doing OK but sooo sorry about the shitty, shitty news for BIL and SIL. No words to express the shitty situation except FUCKING CANCER AGAIN. Huge big hugs to you all.

    Take care

    Jan xxxxxxxxx