It's been a while

3 minute read time.

2 months in fact apparently, since my last blog post.

There's been a few things happening health wise - you can see them on my profile if you're interested - but most of the time has been spent sleeping. I'm just SOOOOO tired at the moment, and I'm just not sure why.

Also, TMI moment coming up, I have the worst wind I've ever experienced before. And it's constant. It's to the point where it builds up to proper pain and discomfort, then I have to move around until there's a satisfactory explosion from one end or the other. And when I say explosion.... it is loud and it is prolonged!! It's insane!

Can't work out if it's a side effect of a medication, if it's a problem in and of itself, if my suspected dairy intolerance has become worse, or if it's just because I now pretty much only eat leaves. Lol. Or, a little of everything. Unsure, and no - I've not spoken to the doc about it. Too many other things going on to bother them with 'excessive farting and burping'..... lol

Sunday was a good day. A couple of friends popped round that I've not seen since New Year and we spent the afternoon and evening together. They even took me out for dinner to a Persian place I've been wanting to try. It was a really nice day and I really enjoyed myself. Even if I did come home, sit down, and fall asleep immediately.

However, Monday then was a real struggle. I was tired and very emotional, and was crying at everything. I couldn't work out why until later on in the evening I had a thought..... I have a feeling that being around them for most of Sunday, reminded me how nice it is to have people around. So then on Monday, the loneliness was just overwhelming.

Week to week, I'll maybe see one friend, once. Same friend every time. Other than that - the norm is I'll see and speak to no-one other than my cats. I think that I've become accustomed to it, and it's fine day to day - but then you have a day like Sunday that reminds you that there used to be more to life, there used to be more people around, there used to be activities, fun, laughter. And that's when it hits you how sh*t things really are when you stop and take stock and the blinkers come off.

So today, I made myself a steamed pudding because, well, *points out the window*. If that's not steamed pudding weather I don't know what is! Rosehip and Cranberry flavoured, and not bad if I say so myself! Might even make some custard to go with a second piece after tea tonight!

Tomorrow I'm off to a solicitors office with my friend, as her tw*t of a husband has asked her for a divorce. So trying to support her and make sure she's ok - as she's not doing great tbh. Then on Sat my parents arrive for a night on their way back from Devon where it sounds like they are having a disastrous holiday!! Accessible hotel that actually isn't, and everything is sprawled everywhere so Mum can' get to the bar or pool etc. So I've got in some Cava, they've said they'll buy us a takeaway, and I might just pick up some of her fave flowers at the market too. See if I can't at least make the end a good one! Then on Monday off to hospital to see about these suspect moles.

Fun and games!

Lass

Xx

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Lass. Great to read your blog. You are not alone in that as I read I related to so much! Coping with the life change that brings loneliness is hard but out of that solitude you have produced this blog. Beautifully written. It held me and I saw you and your life in your words.  Im only 6 weeks in to this new life but  I am glad I have my painting and drawing. As soon as I get the next little energy boost Im diving in. Best wishes x

  • Roisinkate

    There are a few blog posts in the series. You can find them if you click on the words "The Butterfly who flapped too hard" at the top of the page.

    Might keep you entertained while you wait for that energy to build. :)

    Thanks for reading, and the compliment!

    L

    Xx